Forever Home | Draco Malfoy

Chapter 4-18: Nightmares

Desiree jolted awake as she took a deep breath. She looked around her to find that her surroundings were unknown. She walked out of the strange room to feel her feet touch the cold grass that laid in the path of what looked like a maze.

"Hello?" she called out. There, she saw him. Cedric. Standing just at the end of the long stretch in the grass. "Cedric," she said in relief as she began walking towards him. Just as she was about three metres from him, he began to walk away.

"Wait!" she picked her pace up to almost a jog as she tried to catch up to him.

"Cedric?" she began to call out as she turned the corner of the maze. She felt her heart drop. There, lying lifeless on the ground, was Cedric.

"No! Please! No!" she began to sob.

"Desiree! Wake up! Desiree," Pansy began to shake Desiree as her screams were muffled by her pillow. "I'll be right back," she began walking towards the door to their room. Desiree couldn't tell how much time had elapsed since Pansy had left. Every second felt like an eternity. She had completely lost track of time. It didn't matter, all she could manage to do was lay in her bed, crying when she was awake, only to wake up screaming when she was asleep.

"Draco, you're the only one that can calm her down. You know I've tried to before," said Pansy as she walked back into the room with Draco at her side.

"I know," he paused. "If you want you can go sleep in my room. I know with all of this it's been hard for you to sleep through the night."

"I don't want to leave her but we have another exam tomorrow," said Pansy.

"Just go. I'll take care of her," said Draco.

Pansy exhaled deeply, "Okay."

Desiree could barely hear their conversation, she was so out of it. The only thing that seemed to sound clear was Draco's footsteps slowly approaching the side of her bed.

"Ally.." his voice was quite, soothing. Her sobs continued. "Hey, you're alright." He pulled her into his arms as he crawled onto the bed. This was the first time Desiree had felt anything, felt someone's touch the way it was meant to be felt, since the day of the third task.

"He's gone," she cried into Draco's chest.

"I know, I know," his voice was the same quite tone.

"He's gone and I can't tell him I'm sorry," she felt a lump in her throat.

"Sorry for what?"

"For everything. For loving him but loving someone else at the same time. God, why couldn't I have talked to him one more time?" she buried her face in his chest again. Tears streamed down her face.

There was a pause, Draco had no words. He tightened his arms around her small body, "Ally, he loved you. And he knew that you loved him. None of this is your fault. Don't do this to yourself."

"Draco..." she paused. "I don't think I can get through this. Every second of the day I think about him, seeing him there on the ground. And when I can finally sleep I have nightmares of him. I can't escape it."

"Look at me," he pulled back to look at her bright green eyes. They were puffy from crying. "You are so much stronger than you think. You've made it through these two weeks. What makes you think you won't make it through the rest."

"Because everyday I feel like the weight of the world is crashing down on me. It feels like I'm alone in the sea of my fears and I'm drowning. I can't see the sun of brighter times shining anywhere near."

Draco exhaled deeply, "Ally I can't begin to think what this feels like for you. But I want you to know that there is a light, the sun is near. You have to want to let it in. You have to want to let it shine. Otherwise you will drown. The waves will overtake you. Ally you have to keep fighting. We all have to go through something that absolutely destroys us in order to become the person we want to, no, need to be. This is yours."

Desiree laid silent against Draco's chest, tears still streaming down her face. This had been the first time she had felt comforted in weeks, according to Draco. This had been the first time she had actually spoken a word about how she felt or at all since the task. She laid, listening to the sound of Draco's heartbeat, hoping that if she fell asleep she wouldn't see Cedric's face again, she knew it would make things all the harder. She began to feel her eyelids begin to grow heavy. She fought them as long as she could until she was finally asleep.

Desiree looked around to find herself in a field of wildflowers. She was wearing a long, flowy white gown. She scanned the field to see anything she recognized. And there, against her wishes, she saw Cedric standing at the other end of the field. She began walking towards him. This time, he stayed where he was.

"Cedric?" she asked as she walked up to him. Tears of joy were in her eyes as she was able to walk up to him. "Cedric," he gleefully hugged him. He hugged her back as he gently lifted her in the air.

"Cedric, I'm sorry. I'm sorry for everything. I should have-" he placed his finger over her mouth. She looked confusedly down to his finger then back to him. He lifted his finger and pointed behind Desiree. She turned to see someone walking towards them from a small cottage Desiree hadn't noticed before. The boy stopped in the middle of the field and gazed at Desiree. "Draco," she whispered as she closely examined him from a distance. She looked back to Cedric, he gave her an encouraging look to her.

"No," she shook her head. "Cedric I can't-" he placed his finger, the same finger he used to quiet her, over her heart. She knew immediately what this meant. She turned her head to look at Draco then back to Cedric. He nodded his head for a moment and gently turned her body in the direction of Draco. And so, she began walking. Each step she took away from Cedric hurt a little less than the previous one. As she finally approached Draco he extended his arm, opening an invitation for her to grab his hand. She looked at Cedric once more. He gave her another encouraging nod. Desiree took a deep breath and grabbed hold of Draco's hand. As the two began walking back towards the cottage she looked back to where Cedric stood. He smiled as he waved to her, his other hand over his heart, and began to disappear from the field.

Desiree gasped as she woke up. She looked around her to find Pansy's bed empty and Draco with his arms still wrapped around her, asleep. She laid on her bed, staring at the ceiling. She knew what the dream meant but was she ready?