You're My Forever

Mental Exhaustion | 95

4 Days Later... 

I sighed as I turned over onto my back in bed after shutting off my alarm. I put both of my hands over my face while keeping my eyes closed.

Lately, I've been genuinely feeling VERY mentally drained and exhausted. And it wall all because of all this family drama and not being able to be with Jack. The three main things that were really getting to me were mostly, not being able to properly date Jack obviously, the conflict with my mom and just missing Jack's whole family in general.

This mental exhaustion was really starting to get to me. I haven't been motivated to do anything, I've been feeling tired constantly, sometimes dizzy and weak as well and I've been having constant bad headaches because of how full my mind has been. It was all really a horrible feeling... 

I barely even felt motivated to get up and go to school anymore. But luckily, it hasn't quite gotten to that point.. yet, at least...

I haven't told Jack about this but I haven't been trying to hide it from him really either. So honestly, he was most likely catching on..

Speaking of Jack, yesterday he told me that his dad actually forgave his mom for the incident. Over the past few days, they have been getting along a lot more, according to Jack.

I was happy for them, but just like for my parents, this just made me frustrated as well. Now both of our parents were back together and happy, but they were still refusing to let us be happy and together...

It was such bullshit... Sadly there was literally nothing I could do about it though.

But anyway, I got up from bed then went over to my closet to get dressed. 

I put on a blue oversized sweatshirt along with some denim black ripped shorts. After tying my hair half up half down and brushing my teeth, I headed out and went to school.

Lunch... 

At lunch, Jack and I right away met up like usual and walked together to the cafeteria with our arms around each other. We found an empty table in there and sat across from each other.

We talked for a while, having random conversations while eating. We were really trying to forget about all of our family drama and it did work sometimes but it was A LOT harder than it seemed, and I knew he could say the same.

I fucking hated it. Outside of school, Jack and I were forced to stay apart because of our families and inside of school, all we could think about was our goddamn families. It's like we couldn't catch a break.

At a certain point, both of us just fell silent while sitting there because of the stress relating to all this that was getting to us. Both of us have been thinking about it the entire time, but by now, it really got to us.

I just couldn't stop attempting to try and find another way to fix everything..

I sighed, closing my eyes as I put my hands over my face, my elbows on the table. "Baby, try not to stress too much.. it's not good for you.." Jack told me quietly, reaching forward and rubbing my upper arm for comfort. "Aren't you doing the same..?" I asked him quietly as well, looking up at him. "I am.. but it looks like it's really getting to you even more. I don't want you to get sick or anything." He said, looking concerned for me.

"Don't worry, I'm fine..." I said, sighing again as I looked down. I really didn't want to worry him even more, at least right now, by telling him how mentally exhausted I've been feeling. "No, Roni, I'm serious." Jack said, a bit more firmly as he got up from his seat and moved over to my side of the table. He sat at the chair right beside mine but was facing me in it. His hand went under my chin and he turned my head to him before pushing some of my hair behind my ear.