ᴛʜᴀᴛ ꜰᴇᴇʟɪɴɢ ᴡʜᴇɴ [ᴇɴ- ᴘᴏʟʏ]

Chapter 84

Present day

She was there. Right where I thought she would be. I made my way to the end of the muddy park. The small pond had almost dried up, revealing the jagged bedrock. However developed the outside world was, this place still held some wilderness to it. The trees looked almost the same, if not bigger. The small rocky corner looked the same, if not more welcoming. And Sanu's figure on one of the rocks looked the same, if not hunched over.

I tried to walk quietly. But I guess it wasn't enough. The dry leaves rustled under my feet and Sanu hastily wiped off her tears. I went and sat down on the rock beside her. Her eyes were red and her face was flush with dried tears. Guilt settled heavily in my bones. I waited for a few minutes before I spoke.

"Hey, Dick-" I started and she looked at me incredulously. "-on. Dickon?"

"What the fuck?" I saw a sliver of her sadness wash away as her snappy self came back for a second.

"Dickon Sowerby?" I said.

She still looked at me like I was crazy.

"The secret garden? Dickon, you bitch." I acted offended.

She made a choking sound when she realized what I was talking about.

"You have seven Dickons now. Why do you want me?" She turned away. "And they are actual Dick-ons too."

Sorry boys. But I'm guilty of laughing at this.

"He was Mary's bestie. Not her love interest." I said and moved over to the rock she was facing.

"Nah. You always shipped them together." She said.

"I did. I was totally hoping for them to be childhood friends to lovers in their adulthood and it would have been totally...hot..." I trailed off when she gave me a 'shut up' look.

I fake coughed and looked at the now empty pond. A beat of silence passed.

"Do you remember that boy whom I had a crush on in 7th class?" I asked.

She didn't say anything but I knew she was listening.

"You told me to stay away from him. Forget about him because he gave off bad vibes to you."

Sanu quietly nodded.

"And I did. I tried to forget him just because you told me to. I looked away from him whenever I caught sight of him. If you didn't like the guy, I was going to trust your judgment. That's why when he proposed to me himself, I said no. Even though I was burning to say yes. Turned out he got one of our classmates pregnant."

I grimaced remembering the ruckus the info had created in school. From the corner of my eye, I saw Sanu's lips slightly curl into a snarl. Now came the hardest part.

"We made a promise that we would never let boys come between us." I paused and looked at her. It was right at this place when we were in 10th class.

She had a look of nostalgia on her face.

"And I broke the promise. I'm so sorry." I whispered the last part.

A beat of silence passed.

"For the past 10 years, I don't remember a single time you raised your voice at me. Except once but that doesn't count."

Her voice was really low. I had to strain my ears to hear her. I remembered the once she was talking about. It was fresh in my mind like it happened yesterday.

"I'll top every exam after this."

And true to her words, she had topped every exam after that. She had been more scared of me spilling the truth to her parents than the rape she went through all those years. And true to her words, she moved out to a hostel for her higher secondary. And God decided to listen to her prayers when she didn't him anymore. Her uncle permanently shifted to US, leaving behind a closed off girl in her late teens.