faking it

chapter 72

short info, dont hate me: comment as much as you can, this chapter means something to me idk. and i wanna know how you feel while reading this.💕

*2 weeks later*

except for the fact that Laura still hadn't really talked to me, everything was like it was before this whole aidan thingy.

no, this was what i wanted to believe,but who should i lie to. nothing was like it was. everything's changed, not all to the best, to be honest.

I dont even wanna explain what happened after the police arrived, it was past.

its been two weeks. two weeks since courtney and laura became enemies - well not exactly but still pretty close to it. two weeks since the kiss of me and maya. two weeks since aidans death.

two weeks since the "broke up" of me and laura.

it was hard for me not attacking her with messages, but I managed it. Like Maya said, you should hear of a girl when she says she needs time. And Laura needed it.

But I needed this time as well. I mean, i shot him. I know i had to do this to protect my girlfriend and everyone else, but still, i shot a person.

I felt like a murder, maybe because i was one and it didnt matter how much i tried to deny th fact that i killed aidan, it followed me everyday.

I was worried about me becoming insane. funny huh?

We kept this all as a secret. My mom would have killed me - when she still would be alive.

My dad? Courtney still didnt give me any details of him 'preparing me' but i can tell you one thing. He didnt stop.

I was tired of asking, i was tired of this world and this place. Maybe i sound depressed. No i was just sad. Terribly sad.

Of course i wouldnt do suicide,ohgod no. Dont think of me this way. I just needed 3 things in this world.

The little bit of family i had left
My best friends aka Courtney and Maya
and her.

since i lost the woman i loved the most already and was about to lose the second one. Rydel and my other siblings were with Courtney and Maya my only escape.

Yes i loved Maya, so i loved Courtney. These two women always managed to make me smile, even in the hardest times.

Maya met a boy with the name Jasper. He was awesome, so filled with happiness, so dorky and he was perfect for her. I was happy for Maya, she really deserved the best.

Courtney and Jace decided to leave this city. They were happy as well. The goodbye me and Courtney had this morning hurt so much. It wasnt just Court leaving, it was the girl leaving me who healed my wounds once, who made me feel like i was worth it. But we smiled.
Wanna know why? because we knew this wasnt the end.

I loved them. but that was the difference between them and Laura. I loved Maya and Courtney.

but i was inlove with Laura.

-

"Laura, you and me will talk now. If you want to or not!" I said, grabbing her arm as she wanted to turn around.

"I know that, Ross! I was just trying to avoid this talk." She said and ripped her arm away and looks down short, collected her thoughts.

I was in her room with her so there was nowhere she would go anyway.

"Okay. Begin. Tell me everything you want." Laura almost whispered and looked at me.

I took a breath and locked my look with hers, "I love you. this didnt change."

She kept her mouth shut and I continued, "I know, i made stupid fucking mistakes in the past. Beginning a relationship with Maia. Faking one with you. Being an stupid asshole and many others. But protecting my best friend isnt one of them. I also know i should have told you, but please try to understand. I love you! i would never let anybody or anything hurt you."

Lauras face went from neutral to sad immediately as I finished that sentence.

"And would i have told you, the chance of you getting hurt would have been too high. I just couldn't. I dont know how these motherfuckers could kidnap you, but actually kidnapping people is too easy." I laughed short quietly before looking at her again.

"I know youre mad at me and especially at Courtney, and i totally respect that. But in the last time, somethings changed in you. Toward me. Youre distant. cold."

I felt myself getting wet eyes, shit why was i such a baby?

My voice started shaking lightly, "I leave you alone from now on if thats what you want. Is that what you want? And you know why id leave you alone? because i care about your feelings more than mine."

"Ross, no." She said and took my hand. "I dont want you to leave me, i need you more than you think.."

I nodded, "then dont push me away, please."

"I had to take myself time. And now, i finally progressed it. You protected me, you saved me. Thank you for being my hero."

"Thats all i always wanted to be." I whispered and with that, she hugged me.

A hug i needed, We both needed. I wrapped my arms around her tiny body and hugged back, laying my head on her shoulder.

We didnt say anything for a while. This moment wasn't awkward or something.

When we pulled apart, we looked in each others eyes, sadness filled hers but also love and a bit happiness.

"Did we break up?" I whispered, still having my arms around her waists.

Laura shook her head, "I couldnt break up with you. What we have gone trough was tuff, but it just shows we can do everything. together."

I smiled a bit and kissed her.

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I finally updated , yay.

these ahs quotes are killing it, right. i just finished season 4. beaaaautiful. haven't thought this would actually be great since everyone said it was shit.
i loved evans role and jessicas and i loved everyone. the ending was hella confusing but each seasons ending is somehow confusing right hahha

in 2 days ill have my wisdom teeth out and im nervous like shit. well my friend beckygaga has it tomorrow, wish her luck and me as well btw.

also just one fosterless monday im so happy and on the 20th of July i get the 100 season 3 finally in german so the hiatus til season 4 will be so much easier 😻 when i will survive everything of course haha

and i was probably drunk the first time yesterday, congrats monique. it was such a funny night yesterday. I like to remember it :) 💞

goodnight, i love evan peters more than you :b