Head canons

Blackmail (TUA)

610 words. taken from Pinterest.

Klaus: Hey, Ben, look at these really stupid videos of Five

Ben: Use those as blackmail.

Klaus: Good idea! I'll blackmail him for a bag of cheetos.

Ben: Think bigger.

Klaus: Two bags of cheetos!?

Ben: No...

Klaus: Family sized cheetos!!?

Ben: He never gave you your $20.

Klaus: $20 worth of cheetos!?

Ben:*facepalm* Sure.

~later~
Klaus: Look at this picture I have of Vanya.

Ben: I would suggest blackmail, but you're not the best.

Klaus: I think I want four 2 oz bottles of Mountain Dew.

Ben: Sure.

~later~
Klaus: I have this video of Diego and a few pictures of Allison.

Ben: What do you want from them?

Klaus: Five packs of cookies each.

Ben: You're going to die from a sugar crash.

Klaus: At least it's not death from drugs, Ben. Wouldn't you rather me die from sugar?

Ben: I'd rather you not die at all.

~later~
Klaus: I have pictures and videos of Luther.

Ben: Let me guess, something that's going to put you into a diabetic coma?

Klaus: Of course not. That's only for siblings that didn't almost get me killed.

Ben: Technacally, you were dead for about two minutes.

Klaus: Anyway, from Luther, I'm going to hang them over his head until I'm satisfied.

Ben: So... forever.

Klaus: Yep.

~later~
Diego: Luther, this is the fifth family meeting this week. I don't think it was necessary.

Luther: I didn't call this meeting.

Klaus:*turning around in a large chair* I bet you're wondering why I called you here.

Diego: Yeah, we are.

Vanya: Can you make it quick. I have a lesson in thirty minutes.

Klaus: Of course. Vanya, step into my office.

Vanya: What office?

Klaus: The hallway.

Klaus and Vanya:*go in the hall*

Klaus:*shows Vanya the pictures and videos of the other siblings* Get me four 2 oz bottles of Mountain Dew and you can use this for blackmail as well. If you don't, this picture *shows picture of Vanya* will be shown to everyone.

Vanya: I'll have your soda after the lesson.

Klaus: Please get Diego.

Vanya:*gets Diego* *leaves*

Klaus:*shows pictures and videos of the other siblings* Get me five packages of cookies and you can use these for blackmail as well. If you don't, this video *shows video of Diego* will be shown to everyone.

Diego: I didn't need to see everything else. I just want the picture of Luther. You'll get your cookies within the week.

Klaus: Please get Allison.

Diego:*gets Allison* *leaves*

Klaus:*shows pictures and videos of the other siblings* Get me five packages of cookies and you can use these for blackmail as well. If you don't, this picture *shows picture of Allison* will be shown to everyone.

Allison: Hmm. I'll get your cookies tomorrow.

Klaus: Please get Five.

Allison:*gets Five* *leaves*

Klaus:*shows pictures and videos of the other siblings* Get me as many family sized bags of cheetos as you can with the $20 you owe me. If you don't, this video *shows video of Five* will be shown to everyone.

Five: Give me five minutes.

Klaus: Wait, I have to blackmail Luther first. Get him, then go get the cheetos.

Five:*gets Luther* *teleports away*

Klaus:*shows pictures and videos of Luther* You have to do whatever I say, or the other siblings get these.

Luther: Deal.

~later that week~
Klaus:*hands out one picture or video of Luther per sibling* *keeps most of them for himself*

Ben: And I thought you didn't know how to blackmail someone.

Klaus:*shows Ben a picture of him from when he was a kid*

Ben: I hate you.