Calm Down Tiger

35: The Bravest Kind of Love

Donghae's POV

I sigh again after fixing all of the mess that was left after the confrontation this afternoon. I am still glad that Hangeng Hyung was able to arrive before Hyukkie was able to punch White. I am so scared—I don't want Hyukkie to regret something in the future if he will hit White. My boyfriend is a good person and he will try to be a good and understanding person until the end but today—he snapped.

I went to the back door where I talked to Gun before. I don't think I will be brave enough to go in the room together with Hyukkie—not now. I know he is very upset of me. Gun and Captain are back in their rooms and Heemi, Heechul Hyung, and Hangeng Hyung are all in their room. Hyukkie's Appa and Umma are already back but we didn't say a thing. Captain was afraid that their parents will try to talk to Hyukkie. I am glad that both of them are still thinking about their brother.

Right now, all I want is to breathe and talk to someone—and I know who is the right person to talk right now. I pulled out my phone and dial my brother's phone number. I hug myself a bit while waiting for him to answer, "Hyung—hurry up~" I mumbled before I heard the voice that I wanted to hear right now, "Yeoboseyo? Donghae?" he sounds so tired. I feel bad but I want to talk to him.

"Humm—hyung~" I answered back with my soft voice. I don't want someone to hear me talking to Donghwa hyung—especially Hyukkie. I just—don't have the heart to make more trouble for him, "How was your trip Donghae?" hyung asked me again and I smile a bit, "So far so good hyung. I am enjoying the stay~" I rub my shoulder while my other hand is on my phone gripping it tightly. "Are you sure Donghae? You didn't sound like your—happy." He really can pick up my emotion very well.

I sigh and look up at the sky. There are so many starts tonight I wonder if hyung can also see them too, "I think—I hurt Hyukkie," I confessed. Probably, hyung is still at our café because I heard the chair he pulled, "Hyuk doesn't seem like a type of person who will get mad easily at you Donghae. I am actually amazed how he can keep up with you so well," he joked around probably making the mood lighter but I can't find my will to laugh, "But I did—I just did hyung," I am lying if I will say that I didn't get scared of him when he shouted at me but somehow—at the back of my head—I knew I deserve that.

"Tell me," hyung said and I know I need to confess everything to him. I close my eyes, "I like his family so much Hyung—maybe I liked them so much that I crossed the boundary. I forgot that I am only his boyfriend and not yet his family," I feel hurt because I know that when Hyukkie told me that I shouldn't educate his brothers because they are his brothers, I don't want just to be his boyfriend—I want to be part of his family too. I sigh, "I tried to help them a bit hyung but Hyukkie didn't like it—maybe I am really being nosy and I shouldn't put my nose into someone's business—but I can't help it hyung. I knew that I should do something when I heard Gun's conversation with Mark and I knew that Hyukkie would be so mad but maybe I am too confident that he won't get mad at me so I tried my best to hide the secret together with his brothers—" I open my eyes and still see the vast of starts on the sky, "And in the process of helping his brothers—I forgot that I will also hurt my boyfriend's feelings," and that is what I am so upset right now.

Hyukkie has been the best for me. Supporting me in everything he can. I am a freelance photographer and composer and my works normally happen once in a while so I know that I will be a pain for him. He is supporting his family here in Thailand and I became another mouth he needed to feed back in Korea. That's why I cannot accept it when people are saying that I am too good for him. Hyukkie is way beyond good for me—way beyond perfect and I just hurt the person that gave almost everything to me. "Just how bad did you do, Donghae?" hyung asked me again.