Assistance Required

Nervous

TW homophobia, cursing, anxiety

Sat Feb 6

Virgil watched Logan pace around the room. He wasn't sure if he should try to stop him or just let him run around. He thought it might be better to let him work off all his nervous energy before dinner, but that didn't mean he couldn't try to be encouraging.

"Logan?"

Logan stopped and turned to look at him.

"Sorry, am I bothering you?" Logan asked.

Virgil shook his head.

"No, I don't mind. I just... I know you're nervous right now, but we'll be there too. You aren't dealing with them alone."

"Honestly, that's part of the problem. I've grown somewhat used to their opinions. They still bother me, but I can handle it. This is the first time they're meeting all of you guys. I'm just... I'm a little worried about what they'll think." Logan sighed and sat down next to Virgil on his bed. "Especially of Patton. I know I can't tell them everything, but... I still want them to like him. Is... is that weird?"

"No. I get it. Patton is important to you and you want him to get along with your family and you want your family to like him. Even if they don't know just how much he means to you."

"Well... maybe if they start to like him it'll be easier to tell them. I... I don't know. A part of me wants them to know. I don't like hiding who I am from them, but I know how they'll react."

Virgil could understand how he felt in a way. He still wished his dad could understand and accept who he was. He loved art and he didn't feel the same about girls as he did guys. He couldn't change if he wanted to. It didn't help most of the world was against who he was, but his dad? Parents were supposed to protect and help their children, not hate them for what they can't control.

"I'm... I'm sorry, Logan. I know it's hard."

"There's nothing anyone can do about it, but I do appreciate your sentiments."

"Yeah... anytime."

Logan chuckled dryly before standing up.

"I'm going to meet them early. I'll see you soon?"

Virgil nodded.

"See you in a bit."

Logan closed the door behind him leaving Virgil alone with his thoughts. He felt kind of weird. Logan lent him one of his shirts since he didn't really have anything nice to wear. He did want to make a good impression but he wasn't sure how good of an impression he'd be able to make. He even washed off his makeup, which was really weird for him. He felt kind of awkward without it. He was kind of wishing his hair wasn't a faded purple right now. His natural brown hair was more visible now and he was in desperate need of a hair cut. He didn't entirely mind the long hair, but it was a little annoying. But from what he heard about Logan's parents, he was a little nervous about what they'd think.

He took a deep shaky breath and grabbed his phone. They weren't meeting them for another twenty minutes. He thought about leaving the room to join the others but he wasn't sure if he actually wanted to get up yet. He heard a knock at the door.

"Come in."

The door opened to reveal Patton. He smiled nervously.

"Do you know where Logan is?"

"He um... he went to meet his parents early. Sorry. What do you need?"

Patton bit his lip.

"O-oh. It's fine. I don't really need anything. I just want to check in."

Virgil frowned as he watched Patton nervously pick at his clothes.

"Patton... is everything okay? You seem kind of nervous."

Patton let out a defeated sigh.

"Is it that obvious?"

Virgil nodded. Patton walked into the room, closing the door behind him, and sat down next to Virgil.

"It's just... I know they only think I'm a friend, but I still want them to like me. I'm meeting his parents for the first time. I'm a little nervous about making a good impression. They seem hard to please."

"Yeah... but you're also a pretty lovable guy. There aren't many people who don't like you but they only hate you because they're assholes."

"Watch your language!" Patton laughed.

"What? It's true! Everyone who knows you loves you except the assholes! But they're assholes so they don't count. Who cares what they think."

"You're doing it on purpose now!"

"What? Saying asshole? Sorry, I'll stop saying asshole."

"Virgil!"

They both laughed. They sat in silence for a minute before Patton smiled at him.

"Thanks," he said as he stood up.

"For what?" Virgil asked. He didn't think he did anything special.

"For listening and helping me relax a bit. I needed a good laugh."

"Oh... anytime."

Patton gave him another smile before leaving the room. Virgil wasn't entirely sure what just happened. Did he really help? He didn't do anything. He guessed he did make Patton laugh by calling him lovable and saying asshole a lot. Did that really help?

How often did the others feel like this when he needed help? Patton seemed to understand people pretty well, but was he ever unsure about the advice or help he gave? Maybe that was one of the reasons they were so insistant on him going to therapy. Then they wouldn't be so unsure whether or not they were actually helping. Someone else who knew what they were doing could take care of it. He wished there was a way to assure them but his problems kept coming back. They never really changed. How could he tell them they helped when he kept coming back with the same problem?

He sighed. No use worrying about it now. Right now he had to worry about dinner with Logan's parents. He remembered some of the stories Logan told them. It kind of burned inside. By were they so nervous about making a good impression when his parents were kind of jerks. They made Logan feel like he didn't have a choice in his life anymore. They make him afraid to be himself. They're the ones who pushed Logan to constantly overwork himself. They're the reason he's so stressed out. And they barely even made time for him. They were always busy with their clients.

They didn't often call or message Logan, but when they did, it was to remind him about his schoolwork or see how his grades are. It was never really about him, but his work. Virgil finally stood up and staring walking to the car. Logan wanted them to make a good impression. He wanted his parents to like his friends, so Virgil would play nice. But that didn't mean he had to like them.