Assistance Required

Little Hearts

TW depression

Fri Nov 6

Virgil sat quietly while the professor droned. He was busy doodling in the margins of his notes again. He glanced next to him to see Patton resting his chin on his hand and doodling on his paper as well. Virgil looked at the doodles and realized he was just making lines. It seemed kind of odd since Patton usually liked drawing little hearts and clouds. Virgil looked down at his own notes and traced the times Patton had leaned over and drawn hearts on Virgil's notes to make him laugh. It wasn't really his thing, but Patton seemed kind of down today. Virgil leaned over and drew a little heart on the corner of Patton's paper.

Patton looked up from his paper and looked at him with a confused smile on his face. Virgil stuck out his tongue before returning to his notes. Patton leaned over and drew a heart on his paper as well. Virgil leaned over and drew a little face with its tongue sticking out next to the heart. Patton drew a laughing face on Virgil's notes. Virgil smiled as he went back to doodling on his own paper and Patton went back to drawing on his. When Virgil looked over again, he saw Patton drawing little clouds.

After class, they walked to the student center to go over the notes again. Joan and Remus were already sitting there when they arrived. A couple of hours later, the whole group had arrived. Joan, Remus, Patton, and Virgil at one table, and Logan, Roman, Thomas, and Janus at the other. Virgil was reading again, Patton and Remus were working on papers, Janus was helping Roman figure out math, Thomas was working on chemistry, Joan was watching videos and taking notes, and Logan was doing research for his own paper.

The quiet was rather unsettling for Virgil. He wished he could listen to music or something on his phone. He was finding it hard to focus. He kept glancing at the others around him before trying to read again. He just wasn't into this story. He sighed as he grabbed his crutches and stood up. He needed to be doing something. A couple of the others looked up when he stood.

"Everything okay?"

"Yeah, I'm just going to get some water," Virgil said.

"Be careful," Thomas muttered.

Virgil shot him a look before walking away. He found a water fountain and took a drink. He stood there for a minute and sighed. He didn't feel like going back to the table. He didn't really feel like doing anything. If he was honest, he just wanted to go back upstairs and lay in his bed. Maybe he could go to sleep or something. He knew he couldn't just disappear or the others would worry about him. He walked back to the others and sat down. He pulled out his calculus homework and decided to try to do that. It was better than trying to get into the book.

He wished homework didn't require him actually focusing. He just wanted to let his mind wander. He tried math for a little before giving up. Why couldn't he just focus on his work like the others? He ended up doodling in the margins of his paper again. He wanted to go back to his room. He didn't want to be with his friends. He just wanted to be alone. He was tired and he wanted to lay down. But he knew he'd fall behind if he did that. He had to get some of his work done. He might have gotten a little ahead, but he needed to get something done. Why was this so hard?

He saw a hand flash and draw a little heart on his paper. He looked over and saw Patton smiling at him. Virgil gave him a small smile in return.

"Are you stuck?" Patton asked.

Virgil shook his head.

"No, I just... don't feel like doing anything."

"You don't feel like doing math?"

"No, I just don't want to do anything."

Logan glanced at them but didn't say anything.

"Like, you don't want to do your work?"

"Yeah."

"Do you need to take another break?"

"I don't want to do that either."

"What do you mean?"

"Right now, I just want to go upstairs and lay down. I don't even want to do anything on my phone."

"Virgil, do you mind if we have a word?" Logan asked.

Virgil looked around before shrugging and standing up. The two of them walked around the corner away from the others. Logan fidgeted with his glasses.

"Virgil, have you ever... been diagnosed with depression?" Logan asked hesitantly.

Virgil was taken aback by the sudden interest. He didn't even know what to say at first.

"Um... n-no."

"It would explain a lot of your problems including this sudden disinterest in your work."

"I-I guess..."

"I really think you should try to talk to one of the counselors and see what they have to say about this. They'll probably be able to help you. Until then, do you want me to help you get your math done?"

Virgil stood there for a minute before giving him a slight nod. He didn't feel comfortable asking for help. He didn't like that he needed it, but he also didn't want to fall behind. Logan had helped him before when he had his concussion. But Virgil knew what to do, he just didn't want to do it. Maybe having Logan help him through it would help him get it done. They walked back to the tables and rejoined the others. Virgil sat down and Logan leaned down next to Patton.

"Do you mind if we switch seats so I can help Virgil with his math?" Logan asked Patton quietly.

"Of course!" Patton said.

The two of them gathered their things and switched seats. Logan gently pushed Virgil to get his work done while remaining patient with him. It was slow since Virgil really just didn't want to do it, but Logan didn't let him give up. Virgil really hated everything. He was starting to get irritated, but Logan didn't let that deter him. Finally, after a couple of hours, Virgil got all of his calculus work done. He stared at the papers. He actually did it. He hated it, but he did it. Logan didn't give up on him and he did it.

An hour later, Roman was driving Virgil to work again. Normally, they'd talk about movies or music, but Virgil really didn't feel like talking today. That didn't stop Roman from trying. After Virgil made it clear he didn't want to talk, Roman resorted to singing Disney songs. Virgil was annoyed by Roman's singing, but it was technically his car, so there wasn't anything he could do about it. He decided to stare out the window and let his mind wander. He was really wishing he had his own car back.