Assistance Required

Ugly Words

TW self-depreciation, suicidal thoughts, mental breakdown, cursing, Remus

Virgil sighed and closed his book. He was tired of reading and he was starting to get a headache. He pulled out some paper and decided to work on math instead. It wouldn't help his headache, but he needed to get it done. A few minutes in and he was already getting frustrated. Why was math so difficult? He groaned as he ran his hands through his purple hair. He pushed his papers aside and looked for something else to do. Maybe he could work on his paper and come back to math with a fresher mind. He started brainstorming for his paper. He had already gotten a general idea of what to write about earlier. He just needed a way to start it. How was he supposed to start his paper? He tested out a couple of different introductions before deciding to skip it for the time. He started working on the rest of his paper.

"Wow, and I thought I was messy."

Virgil looked up to see Joan standing near the table.

"Can I join you?" they asked.

Virgil just shrugged and turned back to his paper. Joan sat down diagonal to him and pulled out a laptop. Virgil wished he had a laptop too. It kind of sucked writing papers by hand.

"So what are you working on?" Joan asked looking at Virgil's papers scattered across the table.

Virgil's face flushed as he gathered his papers.

"Sorry," he mumbled. "Right now I'm working on a paper."

"Oh, cool. Who's it for?"

"Thompson."

"Oh, I don't have them."

Virgil didn't say anything. He fidgeted with his pencil. He thought it might be rude but he needed to get back to his work. Joan seemed to take the hint.

"Sorry, I'll let you work," they said.

"Thanks," Virgil mumbled.

They both worked in silence. An hour later Virgil was staring at his paper. He still needed an introduction. He tried out a few more starts before finding something that vaguely worked. It wasn't great, but he didn't care anymore. He placed the paper in a folder in his bag so he wouldn't lose it before he got to the library. He turned back to his math work. He rested his chin on his hand and stared at the paper while he tried to work out the problem. He heard shuffling nearby before someone slid into the seat next to him with a groan. He looked up to see Roman pulling out a laptop.

"I should have done this already, it's due tomorrow," Roman muttered.

"Mood," Joan said.

Virgil tried to tune out Roman and Joan as they engaged in conversation. His mind started wandering. His dad's angry face flashed in his mind.

Get out!

I can't look at you right now.

You'll never get a girl like that.

"Hey."

He looked up to see Joan and Roman looking at him.

"Are you okay?"

He looked down at his hands and realized they were shaking. He sighed.

"Yeah. I think I just need to go for a walk or something," he said grabbing the folder from his bag.

"Do you want me to come with you?" Roman asked.

Virgil shook his head.

"No, I'd rather be alone right now," he muttered.