✘Day #136: N e v e r & S h o u t & N e v e r puns
⌧People who lack the patience for calligraphy willnever have properly formed characters.
⍥I've never enjoyed paperback books: their blend of wooden characters and watered-down plots makes them pulpy.
⌧Outfielders are always shouting some catch phrase.
⍥I've never killed a deer before but I'll take a shot at it.
⌧Never ask a podiatrist for conversions to metric -
⍥he only knows feet.
⌧Old carpenters never die,
⍥they just lumber around.
⌧Motel operators never die,
⍥they just check out.
⌧The retired general would not help his grandson color Easter eggs,
⍥but he did give the boy some cottage cheese.
⌧Old soldiers never dye,
⍥they just feed some whey.
⌧Shopaholics never die,
⍥they just sale away.
⌧Old pianists never die,
⍥they just adagio away.
⌧I never liked befriending assassins.
⍥They're all backstabbers.
⌧I try wearing tight jeans,
⍥but I can never pull it off
⌧I shouted from a mountaintop in Italy and a famous author answered.
⍥I definitely heard an Eco.
⌧The farmer was surprised when his pumpkin won a blue ribbon at the State Fair.
⍥He shouted, 'Oh, my gourd.'
⌧I walked past a gang of youths yesterday and one of them threw a piece of cheese at me,
⍥which hit me on the back of the head.
⌧I turned round and shouted,
⍥"That's not very mature!"
⌧I shouted so loud at the races,
⍥I'm now a hoarse whisperer.
⌧He threw snow in his neighbor's driveway andshouted,
⍥DO YOU GET MY DRIFT?
⌧Never make fun of a Scotsman's traditional garb.
⍥You could get kilt that way.
⌧I've never taken an elevator to the basement floor,
⍥that's just beneath me.
⌧You can never rely on jigsaw puzzles.
⍥They always end up going to pieces.
⌧The ghost never took sides during arguments.
⍥He was super neutral.
⌧When Peter Pan punches,
⍥they Neverland.
[#Sorrynotsorry melo C:]
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