Puns.2

☁Day #83: G e o g r a p h y puns

☁Day #83: G e o g r a p h y puns --I barely understand some of these either, .-.

✎ What do you call a map guide to Alcatraz?

         ✉ A con-tour map.

✎ If Mississippi bought Virginia a New Jersey, what would Delaware?

        ✉ Idaho... Alaska!

✎ What do Clint Eastwood and a map key have in common?

        ✉ Both are legends.

✎ What do maps and fish have in common?

        ✉ Both have scales.

✎ What did Delaware?

        ✉ A New Jersey.

✎ What is round at each end and high in the middle?

        ✉ Ohio.

✎ How did the geography student drown?

        ✉ His grades were below C-level

✎ What is smarter, longitude or latitude?

        ✉ Longitude, because it has 360 degrees

✎ Why do paper maps never win poker tournaments?

        A. Because they always fold.

✎ Why aren't there any Wal Marts in Afghanistan?

        ✉ Because there's a Target on every corner.

✎ What do you call a stoners wife?

        ✉ Mississippi

✎ Why don't cartography students wear high heels?         

        ✉ They prefer map flats.

✎ Why didn’t true north date magnetic north?

        ✉ She didn’t like his bearing.

✎ Why is it easy to get into Florida?

        ✉ Because there are so many keys.

✎ Why did the dot go to college?

        ✉ Because it wanted to be a graduated symbol.

✎ What kind of maps do spiders make?

        ✉ Web-based maps.

✎ What is a nautical chart's best pitch?

         ✉ The depth curve.

✎ What kind of contours can see in the dark?

        ✉ Illuminated contours.

✎ What's a pirate favorite country?

         ✉ AAARRRGHentina!

✎ What always sits in the corner but can move all round the world?

         ✉ A stamp. 

✎ Where do fish keep their money?

        ✉ In riverbanks.

✎ What do you call the little rivers that flow into the Nile?

        ✉ Juveniles 

✎ How can you tell which compasses and scales are intelligent?

        ✉ Because they're all graduated.

✎ What's big, white, furry and always points North?

        ✉ a Polar Bearing.

✎ What does a psychic and a cartographer have in common?

        ✉ They both specialize in projections.

✎ What city always cheats at exams?

        ✉ Peking.

✎ Why does the Yeti know all the map symbols?

        ✉ Because he's a legend. 

[are The Wanted even a thing anymore?

P.S. I can safely say that @BubblyPenguin and I have officially been friends for a year c: (I'm actually not sure what day it was exactly, but it's been a year)]