✉Day #160: W a l k & H o m e & M y & C a t puns

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Day #160: W a l k H o m e M y C a t puns

✿A toothless termite walked into a tavern and said,

        ❑"Is the bar tender here?"

✿When I walked into the lawyer's office he gave a plaintiff cry.

Catatonic - vitamin pills for the kitten?

✿Old tightrope walkers never die,

         ❑they just get high strung.

✿Pets that want a walk can be very dog-matic.

When Mongolians walk they like to take big steppes.

✿When a skunk walked in, the judge said,

         ❑'odor in the court'.

✿A dog who played baseball always got walked.

She was listening for a Russell while walking through the trees.

✿The chickens were distraught when the tornado destroyed their home.

        ❑Hopefully they will be able to recoup.

✿Is it true that several of the justices on the Supreme Court refer to their homes as 'legal pads'?

My trip to the Grand Canyon cost a hole lot of money and gorged my bank account butte it was worth it!

✿Cartoonist found dead in home.

        ❑Details are sketchy.

✿I need to do my philosophy homework but I just Kant.

When the hockey player came home he gave his wife a puck on the cheek.

✿Unfortunately, no one won the lemon eating contest.

        ❑They all went home with a sour-taste in their mouth.

✿The man who impulsively got a cat despite his allergies later realized that it was a rash decision.

Since they started paying dog catchers by the pound, they're feline the pinch.

✿When entering a funeral home,

        ❑remember to stay alert and always look alive!

✿I gave my stressed out feline too much elixir.

        ❑Now it's catatonic.

✿I was terrified anaesthetising my first big cat,

        ❑but I had to feel the fur and do it anyway.

✿I tried talking about our future but she just kept bringing up my past.

        ❑It was a tense conversation.

✿My elderly aunt loves telling jokes while she knits.

        ❑She is a real knitwit.

✿My dentist would simply not stop working on myteeth.

        ❑He was abscessive compulsive.

✿The rodent catcher was always trying to weasel his w

        ❑ay out of work.

✿I know a rancher who has 100 head of cattle,

        ❑but he thought they were only 99 until he rounded them up.

✿The cat would not give up.

        ❑It purred severe.

The man found something to catch fish,

        ❑which was a net gain.

They say curiosity killed the cat,

        ❑and they weren't kitten.

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