Finding Her

Discharge

I wake up screaming and I end up falling out of the bed onto my stomach.
Jane rushes in from using the bathroom.
"What happened baby? Are you alright?"
I wince in pain as I pull myself up.
"Ouch."
"What happened?"
She smiles as she sits beside me.
"I woke up scared and I ended up belly flopping onto the floor."
"I'm so sorry baby"
She hugs me and I sob into her shoulder.
"Sh sh I'm here baby"
She rubs my back and she comforts me.
"You're getting discharge today, are you sure you're ready?"
"Yeah I can't wait to get out of here."
I pull away and nod my head.
A doctor comes in and she introduces me to a rape counsellor.
"Maura, this is Dr.McDonald and she's a rape counsellor."
"Hi Maura, I understand that this has been a difficult process and you don't want to talk about it right now?"
"Yeah"
I nod.
"Okay that's completely fine but I have to schedule a session with you because it's mandatory."
"Fine."
"Would this Friday work for you?"
I look at Jane and she nods.
"Yup"
I say since it's only Monday and I have time to rest.
"Okay"
I give her my personal number so that she can text me the address.
"Actually would you like to go a home session where you find it more comfortable?"
"Um yes please..."
"Okay then you can text me the address whenever you want to. Bye for now Maura."
"Bye"
I frown.
The same doctor that introduced her hands me my discharge forms and I sign them.
She gives me a packet of ibuprofen for the pain and I gladly accept it since I know my endorphins can't cure this pain.
Jane helps to get my bag packed and she grabs the wheelchair.
"Baby I don't need a wheelchair now I can walk"
"Oh okay"
"Sorry"
"No no it's fine"
She takes my hand and we walk out to the car.
She straps me in carefully to avoid hurting my bruised rib.
I smile at her.
She gets in to her side and starts to drive.
My hand shakes as I think about the place I was abducted and my kneed bounce.
I put my nail into my mouth and begin to chew on it.
"Baby I'm going to go a different way home okay just to make you less triggered?"
"Okay thank you."
I was worrying about that and I'm glad she picked up on it.
She goes the different way and parks in our driveway.
I get out of the car and Jane puts my coat over my shoulders
"Thanks baby"
"No problem"
She unlocks the door and I walk inside
I'm greeted by Angela, Tommy and Frankie.
"Oh Maura!"
Angles cries.
She kisses me and hugs me
She's like a second mother to me.
She doesn't let go.
"I'm okay Angela"
I say as a tear falls.
She nods like she doesn't believe me and I don't believe myself.
Tommy hugs me and then he leaves probably because he doesn't know what to say
"I'm sorry Maura."
Tommy says as he rubs my back whilst hugging me.
"It's okay"
Everyone leaves and Angela goes to the guest house.
The second everyone leaves I break down crying at the door
Jane rushes over and sits down with me.
She cradles me like a child
"I'm hurting and I can't make it stop!"
I cry out.
"The last time this happened baby you tried to kill yourself , promise me you won't?"
"I won't baby"
I can't guarantee it.
"Let's get you to bed. You need to rest baby"
I nod and she helps me up the stairs.
I get myself dressed and wince as I bandage my bruised ribs.
"You're safe"
She tells me as she spoons me.
I fall asleep quickly on her arms