Finding Her

Revealing

I wake up and stay in bed for two weeks
Morning sickness every single day
I had to cancel two appointments with Sandy and my anxiety had just gotten worse.
Todays the day I have to tell Angela that I'm pregnant.
We invite her round for dinner and she comes with some wine
I refuse to drink it making the excuse that I have a vodka when really it's just sparkling water.
We all dig in to the dinner.
Jane feeds me then she eats her own food.
"Jane and I have something we need to tell you"
"Um okay"
She puts down her fork.
"I haven't been completely honest with you, about why I was in the hospital"
"Did you hurt yourself again?"
"Kind of but that was after the- the rape"
She nods.
Jane takes my hand
"I- I'm pregnant"
I announce and I take a deep breath afterwards
"Oh- oh honey. I'm gonna have a grandchild!"
She holds me as I cry
Angela cups my face and she wipes my tears
They keep falling as my smile grows
"Are these happy tears mira?"
Jane questions
I nod
"I'm so happy!"
"How many weeks?"
"12weeks and 3 days"
"Wow!"
I let her touch the bump which is now growing
It doesn't look like bloating anymore.
It's a bump.
It's a human
"I- I'm going for a scan tomorrow to find out the gender, would you be able to make it?"
"Of course what time?"
"2:40"
"Yep I'll clear my schedule honey"
She rubs my cheek as I smile.
"Thanks so much Ang."
She leaves and I go to bed straight away.