Him || samYU

85. Cry all you want

Sam's pov.

"We need to talk." I told Yu quietly after I locked the door.

Yu sit still on the couch, lowered his big head thanks to the helmet, looks like he still want to keep it on. Whatever the reason is.

But still..

"Can't we take it off first, before we talk?" I asked Yu softly.

Yu then shook his big head. Okay.

"Are you okay?" I asked him another question.

He said nothing, not even a nod or a shake head.

"I want to see your face.." I muttered softly.

I could hear his sniffles. He's crying.

"Yu.." I kneeled down in front of him, then holding on Yu's hands. "Why is your hands shaking? Are you afraid of me?"

Yu shook his head again.

That's good, I thought that he's afraid of me for a second.

"Can't I see your face?" I asked again.

Yu didn't reply again.

"We promised not to hide anything between us, Yu.." I told him softly.

"I know.." Yu talked real quietly.

"I want to see your face." I said again. I want to see his face so bad. And get rid of this fucking helmet.

But Yu shook his head.

"Why?" I asked. I want to see his face, stroked his face, his hair, his eyes..

"Not now." Then Yu replied softly.

Ha.. I want to scream.

"Take it off. I won't look." I told him softly then close my eyes. "Look, I close my eyes. I promise that I won't look at you. Not until you let me to."

Yu said nothing. I still close my eyes and wait for his answer. This takes too long. So I helped him to take it off, while still closing my eyes.

Yu didn't hold on it anymore. That's good then.

"Can I open my eyes now?" I asked him after I put the helmet away behind me. Finally.

"No.. wait." Yu replied quietly.

I just smiled softly. Yu said to wait, so I'll wait.

"What about a hug? Can I hug you?" I asked him another question.

There is no response. That's dissapointing.

But then I heard Yu's softly clearing his throat. Is that a yes? Let's take that as a yes.

So I pulled his hand and hug him tightly, let his head stays on my shoulder while mine is on his shoulder.  I sighed softly, this way I won't see his face even though I open my eyes now.

I want to see his face, but if Yu said no, then I can wait.

"Are you okay?" I asked him again softly.

I could feel Yu tightening his hands on me then he put his face on my shoulder, and he starts to cry.

That feels better now. I just let him cry for a while. Not asking anything more, I just let him cry.

Until after a few minutes, Yu's sniffles is stop and he's so quiet.

"Are you done?" I asked him while kept stroking his back hair.

I waited a few seconds, there is no response.

"Yusuke?" I called his name.

Still, there is no response.