Everything Has Changed

Denial

I stayed in the chair next to Grandma's bed until they took her bed, telling me she would be in the mortuary until the day of her funeral. I listened to everything going on around me but did not react, it felt as though I was in a coma, and I was conscious of my surroundings but did not have it in me to react to them. I was told that as her emergency contact, I had been put in charge of her funeral and the will reading. Lizzie stayed by my side as they cleared the hospital room of all traces of Grandma.

"I'm really sorry but we need this room for the next patient," the nurse said to Lizzie who nodded and put her hand on mine to pull me up.

"Come on baby, we need to go," she said softly.

I nodded my head and stood up, walking towards the hospital bed, and placing my hand on the fresh sheets, "I love you," I whispered before taking a deep breath and walking towards the door.

Lizzie thanked the nurse for everything she had done and followed behind me, reaching out to hold my hand. We walked out of the hospital and into the January air, the cool breeze drying the remaining tears on my cheeks. I kind of zoned out during the drive home, feeling Lizzie's hand rubbing circles on my thigh the whole ride. The next thing I know we are walking into my cold apartment. It was now dark and late at night and cold.

"Grandma was cold," I said quietly.

Lizzie looked at me confused, closing the front door.

"She was really cold," I whispered, looking around the apartment.

"When?" she asked, walking me towards the bedroom.

"Right before she- before she closed her eyes," I replied.

Lizzie nodded her head and pulled me into a hug, "get into bed, I'm going to turn the heating on, okay?"

I hummed and moved to lay down on the cold sheets. I was still in my clothes from our morning in Italy, they were now crumpled and stiff, but I didn't have it in me to get changed. I felt my eyes get heavy and slowly close as I laid on top of our bed sheets.

Elizabeth's POV

I walked back into our bedroom to see a sleeping Y/N, still in her shoes and clothes from the morning, on top of the bed sheets. I let out a breath I didn't realise I was holding and walked over to her, kissing her head softly before taking off her shoes. It was now nearly midnight but we both had tomorrow off work so there was nothing to worry about tomorrow morning. I laid in the bed next to her, instead of getting under the duvet and risking interrupting her sleep, I pulled a blanket on top of the both of us, cuddling into her side and kissing her shoulder before I too fell asleep with only one thing on my mind. The chat I had with Linda, the last chat we had.

*Yesterday*

Y/N closed the hospital room door, and I turned my attention back to Linda who was staring at me, holding my hand. As soon as I looked at her smile I started crying again. I wanted to be so strong for Y/N but the second that door shut, and I saw how fragile her grandma was I completely broke down.

"Please don't cry," she smiled, holding onto my hands with all the strength she had.

I nodded my head, tears still falling, "I'm trying," I laughed wetly.

She laughed too with a sweet smile, "you're not going to stop crying, are you?" she asked.

I shook my head as the tears kept falling, "no I don't think so," I sobbed.

She smiled and squeezed my hand, "I have a favour to ask of you," she started, "a few favours actually."

I nodded my head with an understanding smile.