A Collection of Glee Oneshots 5

Research (Unholy Trinity/Brittana)

Meet me in the bathroom.

Santana raised her eyebrow at the group text from Brittany. She started heading to the bathroom, running into Quinn on the way.

"Hey."

"Hey." Quinn repeated. "Any idea what Brittany needs us for?"

"Nope." Santana shook her head, and the girls continued walking until they reached the bathroom.

Santana led Quinn inside, where they found Brittany standing by the mirrors. Brittany looked excited as she greeted Santana and Quinn before closing the bathroom door and locking it.

"Alright, we're both here." Santana said, crossing her arms. "Spill."

Brittany grinned. "I've been doing some very important research."

Quinn raised an eyebrow. "Research?"

"For Fondue For Two." Brittany nodded. "And I learned something."

"Well, don't keep us in suspense, Britt." Santana said.

Brittany pulled out her phone, tapping it a few times before holding it up. "I bugged the choir room. Anything anybody says in there comes right back here."

"Wait." Quinn said. "You've been spying on all of us?"

Brittany shrugged. "It's research."

Santana smirked and shot Quinn a look. "This is gonna be good."

Brittany cleared her throat and tapped her phone screen, bringing up a voice memo. She hit play, and the muffled voice of Rachel began echoing through the bathroom.

"Oh, how nice of you to show up, Finn."

"Coach Beiste asked to see me, sorry."

"You could've texted me."

"I'm not that late."

"I already finished warming up."

"Why do we always have to do everything your way?"

"Because you and I are responsible for the New Directions loss at Nationals last year, which means we have to make sure it doesn't happen again. We have to be perfect, especially so I can get into NYADA."

"And what about me? You know, I've been talking to some of the guys and they made me realize that all we do is talk about your future. What about mine?"

"It's our future, Finn. We can talk about that later. Right now, we need to rehearse."

Brittany giggled at the argument between Rachel and Finn. "Juicy, right?"

Santana nodded. "What else do you have?"

Brittany didn't need any encouragement. She tapped on her phone again, bringing up a new recording. This time it was Blaine's voice.

"Do you really think I have what it takes to be the male lead when Finn graduates? More than Artie or Sam?"

"Of course I do. You're so talented. And you've led a glee club before."

"It could be like the Warblers again."

"I'll talk to Finn about it. Maybe he can convince Mr. Schue that you deserve it."

Santana smiled in amusement. "Kurt's plotting, huh?"

"Yeah, and Blaine Warbler's gonna be the new Finn." Brittany stated.

Quinn furrowed her eyebrows at Brittany. "We shouldn't be eavesdropping like this."

"Play the next one." Santana commanded, ignoring Quinn.

Brittany nodded and continued with the next recording. She played one of Mr. Schue and Coach Sylvester fighting, one of the underclassmen complaining about being in the background, and one of Artie and Mike.

Brittany paused and looked at Santana and Quinn.

"This one's good."

Brittany hit play again, and Sam's voice was instantly recognizable. "Mercedes, it's like you're avoiding me. Like we can't even be friends when everybody in this room has dated and broken up and dated again and dated someone else, and-"

"We're still friends, Sam." Mercedes interrupted. "I'm just trying to focus on the competition and my future."

"You sure it doesn't have anything to do with us? Or with me coming back?"

Santana made a face. "Yikes, Trouty Mouth."

Quinn folded her arms. "You two really don't think you're going too far with this?"

"Wait." Brittany shook her head. "I saved the best for last."

Brittany hit play, and suddenly Quinn's voice echoed through the bathroom.

"I told you before, I'm graduating and leaving Lima, and I'm never looking back."

"We don't need to listen to this one." Quinn muttered, reaching for the phone.

Brittany pulled it away, and Santana hushed Quinn.

"I know that, but can't we at least keep fooling around? I mean, I'm going kinda nuts here."

"You say that like you can't get anyone else."

"Anyone else isn't you."

"I think we've heard enough." Quinn noted.

There was a pause and Puck's voice continued.

"I've been trying to forget, but ever since last week, I can't stop thinking about it. And you know I'm okay with something casual."

"We don't have the best track record, Noah."

"Does anybody? The glee club isn't exactly full of dating experts."

The recording faded out, and Santana smirked at Quinn.

"So this is why you guys have been having eye sex in the choir room."

"We have not." Quinn insisted, shaking her head.

"He wants you." Santana commented.

"Bad." Brittany agreed.

"We are not talking about this." Quinn decided. "Brittany, I can't believe you've been listening in on everybody."

"It's fun." Brittany shrugged as she pocketed her phone. "It's research."

"It's invasive." Quinn said. "What are you planning to do with that?"

"Play it on Fondue For Two." Brittany answered.

"You can't." Quinn replied. "I mean, how would you feel if conversations you thought were private were posted online?"

"How many viewers do you think she has, Quinn?" Santana asked.

"You really want all of our friends to see that Brittany secretly recorded them and then shared it?" Quinn wondered as she turned to Brittany. "This has to stop."

"You're not curious to see what everyone's hiding?" Santana questioned Quinn. "I mean, you heard those recordings. We can see what happens with Sam and Mercedes, and Finn and Rachel. Besides, you can hear what Puck's saying about you."

Quinn was interested in the recordings and was glad Brittany shared them with her, but she knew it was wrong. "Just delete everything, okay?"

"Where are you going?" Santana asked as Quinn walked to the door.

"To talk to Noah." Quinn answered, opening the door. "Not in the choir room."

When Brittany and Santana were alone, Santana turned to Brittany.

"Quinn has a point. I don't want everyone to be mad at you for sharing this stuff."

"So all my research's gonna go to waste?" Brittany frowned.

"This is way too much fun to give up." Santana noted. "So you and I are just gonna keep the secrets to ourselves from now on."