Ask BAM ~A wattpad advice column~

BAMspeaks (2)

Hey lovies! So it's another BAMspeaks! So last time I asked a couple questions and told you who ever answered them would get shoutouts so here are those people c:

@CaNtEvErSpElL

@KazKat

@London_SuperNova_978

So go check there pages out and follow them c:

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To get a shoutout next BAMspeaks just answer the question below in the comments C:

What do you think makes a good relationship? explain if needed.

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So I just kinda wanted to make this BAMspeaks kinda like a get to know me. I mean I answer all of you and you come to me, being a complete stranger, and you probably kinda want to know who your actually sending your questions to right? lol Well here's your oppurtunity to get to know me a little more. I did have a chapter on Ask Alex the first one called "All About Alex" which I wrote back in September-October and actually has a lot that I revealed about myself including how the name "Ask Alex" came to be, how I give such great advice, why I help people, what I want to be when I grew up, How long I had been writing for, places I've been to, What I look for in a guy, and some other little things. Now looking back I actually revealed a lot o-o But anywho today I guess I'm going to tell you some stories of my childhood. So enjoy storytime ^_^

1.  I was abandoned by my mom at 3 months old. Went to live with my dad and acted out with his new wife at 3 years old. 

2. 3 years old I remember being a flower girl at my uncles wedding. I danced and sung infront of everyone on stage and lets just say no one could forget me because of that time c: 

3. I grew up traumatized really. I've been abused physically, mentally, and emotionally by my mom and even my dad. I spend my nights and days crying, mad, and just ready to give up on my life not even a preteen. 

4. I didn't have much friends growing up. I'd usually have one or two to call a friend. 

5. I barely smiled and looked constantly sad at school. Even had a friend said they wanted to see me smile because they have never seen me smile before. I knew her since 5th grade and she asked me this around 7th grade so you can see everything in my life had effected me to be a quiet, keep to herself, always looking depressed person. I was basically always in my head. School was the place where I escaped home.. sometimes It came down to, I was too scared to even go home.. I wanted to stay in school forever. Now that I've grown up.. I hate school but I really want to stay out of the house. See, I'm home schooled now which sucks so yeah >.> But you may think family is there for you when really I just want to escape from them, even til this day. 

6. I've had rumors spread about me 7th and 9th grade. The 7th grade one was because I liked this guy since 3rd grade and finally wrote a note telling him how I felt.. then kept sending him more apoligizing and other stuff... he kept showing the notes to people which I should have learned the first time to stop sending them but anyway this girl started telling everyone I was a stalker.. I cried about it before the bus came one day.. Literally was hurt. 9th grade some guy spread a rumour about me saying I had slept with him and have STD's... didn't even know the guy and was a virgin. Oh and also some girl wanted to beat me up.. didn't know her and didn't know why she wanted to beat me up but she did.. Went half of my Freshman year watching my back just incase someone random was going to attack me. 

7. I was cyber bullied in 9th grade. I had a formsprings and Idk how but people started finding out what was happining in my life and started to send nasty and hateful messages. Told me to die.. to go into a homeless shelter, my best friend doesn't like me and is only putting up with me, I was ugly, I looked like a gorrilla, I was fat, etc.. I didn't have many friends and got messages saying that I wasn't popular so most of those messages were probably from my friends.. I started to trust people less. I started to talk even more less to the friends I had. Eventually I started to hang around maybe 2 or 3 people. That time hurt too because of it all.. Not knowing who to trust and just really just so much.. I basically confided in tumblr that year.. made me escape and make me feel better some how. 

8. I was kinda bad in m 14-15 years.. snuck around and everything. 6th and 7th grade I would sneak different clothes on and all that stuff because I wasn't allowed to dress a certain way and etc.. I got caught hah got slapped by my mom even but hey that's just another memory. But I didn't get caught for sneaking around and stuff because I wasn't living with my mom anymore lol But there's a whole bunch of stories with that to save for another day cx

9. Til this day I still dance, pretend to act out scenes alone, sing, and write because those are things that help me cope with my life.. I probably would be diagnosed with a lot of things if I went to see a therapist right now.. Probably anxiety, maybe bipolar, moderate or seasonal depression, and who knows what else,  but I can say I got through a lot. My childhood really wasn't a childhood.. not with a broken family and not with a damaged me..

So there you guys go a little more pieces of me. Hope this helped to show that I'm not perfect and I'm just like you guys. I've gone through a lot just like all of you. But what matters is, I'm still fighting no matter how many times I've sunk and almost drowned. I'm still here. And on the days that I don't reply.. it's because I do need a little break.. I still got things going on in my life but some days I just set my own problems aside for all of you because I know you need help on something and I love helping. But I do have days where I do need to be alone. 

Thank you guys for readingc:

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As always have a blessed day everyone ^_^