Spider-Man/Peter Parker One-Shots

Gag Reel Of "D-D"

A gag reel is like a compilation of bloopers/outtakes, which in this case would take place during the events of the two parts in "D-D". I can't really explain it very well, so just read on and you'll understand. [Warning: if these aren't funny, I'm sorry.]

-After you're out of the fire and the three firefighters/paramedic are talking-

"The couple died in the fire," the chief answered.

"How am I supposed to tell her that?" The paramedic wondered aloud.

Silence met the question, but when nobody said anything after a minute, the paramedic looked over at Spider-man. "I said, HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO TELL HER THAT?" He looked at the group of three with a questioning gaze.

"Do I have a line there?"

"Yes, you do," the director looked up from the script.

"Oh, um...sorry." A script was thrown at him, which he just managed to dodge.

-Right after you and Peter get to his house-

"Can you climb on walls?" You asked. He nodded. "Can you teach me how to do that?" You held your blanket in front of you as you jumped up and down.

"Yeah, it's easy really," he smiled and folded his arms. "All you have to do is be bit by a radioactive spider and you'll become awesome overnight."

"Do I get abs too?" Your eyes were wide as you looked up at him.

"Absolutely."

-When Peter's about to take off his mask-

"You can't take it off!" You stopped him.

"Why not?" He crouched in front of you.

"Because you're ugly." Peter's jaw dropped as you stared at him in complete seriousness.

"Please tell me that's not your line."

"No, it's not," the director assured him as your face broke out into a smile. He flicked your forehead lightly, letting out a relieved breath while you giggled.

-When Peter is about to leave the room-

"Night Petey-Wheaty," you called, making him freeze. He spun on his heel to face you.

"It's Dad, actually. And night (Y/N)-(Something/That/Rhymes/With/Your/Name)."

"It's sweetie!" You shouted as he shut the door.

-When you go with Aunt May to pick Peter up from school-

Peter looked up automatically at your voice and his face broke out into a grin when he saw you running as fast as your little legs could go. He crouched and spread his arms out and you ran right into him.

However, you didn't ram into him fast enough or hard enough to knock him over. You pouted as Peter laughed.

"You're too fat," you punched him, which didn't do a whole lot since your fists were tiny.

"I am not!" Peter poked your sides and you erupted into giggles.

-When someone insults Peter-

"Yo, Parker!" Someone shouted, making you both look over to see who it was. "I didn't know you got laid!"

You faced the person who said the words, face blank, and raised two middle fingers at them. Peter's eyes widened as Ned burst out laughing.

"Cut! Cut!" The director shouted to the cameraman. Before the cameraman could end the video, the director was seen approaching you. "Who taught you that?!"

-When Ned comes over-

"Dude, you should've told me you adopted a kid. I thought the media was just making that up!" Ned shuffled into the room and Peter shut the door.

"Can I be an uncle?" Ned pleaded, looking between the two of you. Peter frowned as you started to smile.

"I don't think that's in the-"

"Yes, you can." You leaned forward in Peter's arms and squished Ned's cheeks in your small hands. "You will be my Uncle Neddy."

"Wait, since you're Spider-man, does that mean spiders are related to you too?" Ned suddenly said, making your eyes widen. Peter sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose.

"Guys..."

"I want little spider cousins!"

"Does that make them my spider nieces and nephews if I'm your uncle?"

"We should probably cut," Peter faced the camera. You and Ned kept talking as the crew behind camera laughed.

"Yeah, we probably should. They're getting really off track," the director agreed. "Cut!"

-When you want to sleep with your dad-

"Can I sleep with you?" You asked, holding your blanket tightly in front of you. He smiled and moved as far from the edge as he could so you had room. You settled in the open spot, eyes running over his almost naked body.

"Like what you see?" Peter smirked.

"Peter!" The director shouted. "She's a child!"

You laughed. "I should've said that to you when I was changing in part 1."

"Oh my word you two," the director put their face in their hands.

-Rock Pack-

You kept poking his chest and Peter tilted his head. "What are you doing?"

"Making your fangirls jealous," you giggled. He rolled his eyes and grabbed your wrists so you couldn't poke him anymore. You pouted, pulling the puppy-eyes and he turned away so he couldn't see you. Your puppy-eyes were as useful in the story as they were in real life.

"But Daaadddddddddyyyyyyyyy," you whined.

"Shhhh child," he pulled you into his chest, blocking your face from view of the camera. He pet your hair as you pouted.

-At the very very end-

You were fake-asleep in 5 minutes, and while he smiled down at you with love-filled eyes, he wondered if the moment could get any more perfect.

Peter knew what you were about to do, so his hold tightened on you. You tried to spring from his arms and yell into the dark room, but the leaving Peter's arms part didn't work. You pushed on his chest to get out of his grasp but you couldn't get away.

"Goshdangit Parker," your muffled voice came from within his iron grip.

"I'm not going to let you ruin this perfect moment!" Peter declared.

"Fine," you slumped in his arms, sighing loud enough for him to hear. It was quiet for awhile, the only sound breaking the silence being you and Peter's breathing.

"And that's a wrap!" The director shouted, getting off their directing chair. "Man, that took a long time," they stretched as you and Peter got off the couch. You gazed up at Peter, and he noticed your sights on him. His eyes narrowed as you reached a hand up, forming a poking hand (the pointer finger is extended while every other finger is folded) and pointed it at his stomach.

You jabbed him and took off running, and Peter instantly gave chase. The director watched them run around the set, and sighed. At least they didn't have to film anymore.