Love Suicide

LII

DECEMBER 11: Friday

Four days. She's been missing. But it seems like it's converted into years.

I heavily sigh as I parked my car in the middle of the road. Wala namang ibang dumadaan diro kasi abandonadong lugar na 'to.

This place is totally familiar. Sa tabi lang kasi ng abandonadong building na 'to ay ang tulay na kung sa'n niya ako dinala. No'ng naghahanap ako sa kaniya, hindi ko naman kasi inakala na gugustuhin niyang pumasok sa isang abandonadong gusali na 'to, where in fact, she's afraid of the dark.

"J-jacq?" I shouted but my voice just echoed the whole building. I heavily sigh as I went up stairs again. This building is a five story building and I'm on the third floor.

Hinanap ko siya sa iba't ibang sulok ng bawat floor pero wala pa din siya. Hindi pwedeng maubusan ako ng pag-asa kasi alam kong nandito pa siya.

"Jacq!" I called her again but my voice echoed the nth time around. When I reached the fifth floor, I was surprised of what I've seen.

A tent and she's just sleeping there.

All of a sudden my eyesight were starting to get blurry and I don't know how I manage to step closer to her and crouch to see her closer as she's fast asleep.

It's just four days ago since the last time that I saw her yet I miss her so bad. I smile as I looked at her features. Damn, hindi pa din siya pumapalyang patibokin ang puso ko ng ganito.

"I miss you so bad, Jacq Nav." I whispered as I close my eyes and feel my tears running down my cheeks. I wipe my tears off and touched her face.

She opened her eyes and looked at me surprised. "Q-quin?"

I genuinely smile at her and immediately hug her when she got up from being lying inside the tent. "Uh," nagpumiglas siya mula sa pagkakayakap ko sa kaniya.

All I wonder is...

She didn't even hug me back.

"Why?" I asked her almost losing my shaky voice. She looked away from my gaze and stood up.

"Go away, Quin." She said like those three words would make me better.

"Why would I leave you here all alone?" I asked her, following where she'll be going.

"Because you have to." She said as she stopped from walking. She face me and smile genuinely. "Ms. Richie must be worried about you. Baka hinahanap ka na niya." She said but I look at her with my eyebrows furrowed. I pressed my lips in a thin line.

"The hell, Jacq Nav," I said with emphasis. I can't help myself but to control my temper. "I'm much worried about you and I've been looking for you for four fucking days, straight!"

She looked down and looked at me again. "If that so..." She close her eyes and smile. "You shouldn't have look for me. You're just wasting your time."

"If a man know to himself that his love is worth it, then why would he even think that he's just wasting time, finding his love?" She opened her eyes and look at me. "Searching for you is not a waste of time. I'm worried about you, Jacq. For four days, all I want is to find you, all I want is to be with you, Jacq Nav. I miss you."

I saw her eyes, started to fill with tears. "Hindi mo na dapat ako hinanap."

"At bakit hindi, kung 'yon ang nagpapahirap sa'kin?!" Nataasan ko siya ng boses kaya naman napayuko siya at ipinikit ang kaniyang mga mata. Nakita ko ang pagpatak ng kaniyang luha and it hurts me so bad seeing her crying.