Love Suicide

XXXI

DECEMBER 1: Tuesday

I'm looking up at him to see him clearly. I gulp as the thought of what he've done, continuously playing in my mind like it was a broken disk.

I pushed him away when I've realized that I'm still against his body.

I look down as I felt my cheeks like they're burning. I cleared my throat and try compose myself again. I manage to look at him and sigh, heavily. "M-merry Christmas, Quin." I said and turned my back on him and realized that it's already December.

×××

"What's up, Jacq?" Unang bungad sa'kin pagkapasok ko ng classroom namin.

Napatingin ako kay Joshua na ngayon ay may dala-dalang gitara at nakangiting sinalubong ako. I forced a smile because it may be rude if I didn't even put effort to a small gesture.

"Hey, what's up?" He asked once more while following me through my seat.

Napatingin ako sa itaas, iniisip ang kung ano ang pwedeng isagot sa nakakabobing tanong niya. "Up? Ceiling." I seriously said.

Napatingin na ako sa kaniya habang papa-upo ako't nakita ko siya na sobrang tahimik habang naka-upo sa desk ng katabi kong vacant seat pa.

Napa-iling nalang ako't huminga ng malalim bago ko kunin ang phone ko pero napatigil ako nang bigla siyang tumawa. Napatingin ako sa kaniya ay halos mapangiwi ako.

What's with him? Halos mamatay na ata siya sa kakatawa habang hawak-hawak niya ang kaniyang t'yan.

"Nice joke." He said, tryin' to stop from the previous thing he've done.

"Go back to your seats now." Huminga ako ng malalim. Bakit nga ba hanggang ngayon pumapasok pa din ako?

Pagkatapos ng opening prayer ay agad na napa-upo ang Teacher namin sa English na si Ma'am Chavez.

"Okay," she sighed before browsing all of the disarranged folders which is placed on the top of her desk.

The whole class was silent for about a minute after the prayer. "The most beautiful project that I've recieved." She said while filling her lips a wide smile when she finally got the folder which is in a green color.

"Kanino kaya ang paparangalan ni Ma'am Chavez para makalagay 'to sa school papers 'no?" Pagtatanong ng aking katabi na hindi ko naman dapat na katabi.

I just shrugged about his question.

"Miss Nav?" Napatingin naman ako sa tabi ko nang bigla nito akong kalabitin. Alam ko naman na tinawag ako. Hindi lang ako lumilingon. Tinaas ko nalang ang aking kamay dahil wala namang choice, 'di ba? "There you are." Nakangiti nitong sabi.

"Yes, Ma'am?" Pagtatanong ko.

"Come here." She asked me that's why I don't have any choice but to obey.

"Bakit po?" I asked whike I'm leaning on the table.

"Can you call your partner here?" Napakunot naman ang aking noo nang masabi niya ang salitang 'partner'.

"Po? Partner po?" I asked like I'm the most polite person in the world. She chuckled a bit and opened the folder and show me who she was talking about. "Ah, opo." Napapatango kong sabi sa kaniya.