I Didn't Want To Love Him

113 (You're Not What's Best For The Kids)

"This doesn't change anything between us" Blake said

"I didn't think it would" I break the hug and take a seat. "You should go get Emma and go home"

"I'm not leaving Tyler. Emma's fine with Brynn"

"I don't feel comfortable with her there and Amber can't stay with the twins all night" he really didn't want to leave. "They have child care here, can you please just go get her and bring the twins so Amber can go home?"

"What about aunt Cynthia?"

"Not an option" I shake my head

"Fine" he leaves upset.

I go outside to call my family. I was gonna call with good news but I forgot with the whole Tyler thing.

"Hello?" Kira answers and puts it on speaker

"Hey, who's there?"

"Just Kora and John"

"Ok, so I got good news and bad news"

"Good news first"

"Ok then... we don't have HIV"

"What? How do you know?" Kira asks.

"Blake's team gets tested every year for everything and he's never had it"

"Before you continue Carlos and I found out who talked" John said

"What?! Who was it?"

"Nina"

"Nina? What the hell was she doing there?"

"That's what we're going to find out"

"Good and when you do tell Carlos to arrest her"

"For what?" Kora asked

"Defamation I don't know, there has to be a law against it"

"I'll see what I can do. So what's the bad news?" John asked

I take a deep breath. "My son almost drowned"

"What?!" Kora yells. "What happened?"

"Blake happened. They were at Ford's birthday party and he fell in the pool while everyone sang Happy Birthday"

"Jesus Christ!"

"Oh there's more, his bitch of an aunt is here and now he wants a divorce" 

"What?" Kora gets off the speaker phone and talks to me "Kara what happened?"

"You guys where right. I should've told him from the start... None of this would be happening"

"Kara you couldn't have known he was gonna do this... What happened? He doesn't believe you?"

"He doesn't let me talk to him. He just avoids me and ignores me"

"Kara... you need  to talk to him. Your marriage can't end like this, what about the kids?"

"He wants to take them"

"What?! He barely sees them"

"That's what I told him but he still wants them...I don't want it to be over" I whisper. "I love him"

"Then fight for him!"

"I can't"

"What do you mean you can't?"

"I'm too pissed off at him, plus his aunt here doesn't help"

"I understand you're mad at him, trust me I am too. But when it passes you need to tell him the truth Kara. I know how much you love him, just remind him how much you do"

"I'll try as soon as I get everything I want to yell at him out of my system"

"Do you want me to go there? Keep you company?"

"No it's okay" I could use the company, I felt so lonely ever since I got here but I wasn't gonna make her come all the way here to hear my problems. "I'll call you back if anything changes"...

................

About half an hour later Blake arrives with the kids

"Mama" Emma said

"Hi baby girl" I pick her up. "Did you eat something?"

"No"

"No?" I glare at Blake.

"I'll get her some Mac&Cheese from the cafeteria" he leaves

"What am I gonna do with your daddy?" I ask her knowing she didn't understand. The twins were both asleep in their stoller. I put Emma on my lap and grab her beautiful curvy red hair that she got from her dad, except the curvy part, and make a small braid. As I finished with her hair, Blake comes with the food.

"All right, open up" Blake says as he makes airplane noises. He really is a good dad, he just needs a little more work on paying attention to them. After that she falls asleep and I leave them at child care so I could talk to Blake.

"Hey, can we talk?"

"Yeah"

"Outside?"

Both Blake and I don't like making a scene in front of people, especially him being who he is. Rumors quickly get out there and it's the last thing we need so we go out to the parking lot to lonely cars and no one around.

"What?" he asked in a cold tone.

"Let's put aside our problems right now and let's think about what's best for the kids"

"Oh please don't start with this again. I already told you they're not going"

"Well first of all, you can't keep the twins because I seriously doubt you can breast feed them and well, our oldest is in a hospital bed"

"Is this you trying to make a point?" 

"No! This is me telling you the reality of things!! Our daughter hadn't eaten since God knows when and our son almost drowned! This isn't a game!" I yell at him

"So you're not over it then?"

"Over it?! Are you fucking kidding me?! He almost died Blake!! You expect me to forget that?"

"Then why did you say you forgave me?"

"I didn't say I forgave you! I said I was sorry for the way I reacted because you were feeling the same fear I was and I shouldn't have ganged up on you like that! You're not the one who pushed him to the pool, but you were the one who was supposed to keep an eye on him!! And you wanna know what I'm more pissed off about? The fact that if it wasn't for that lady you wouldn't even have noticed!! You're always spaced out  in your own fucking world where life is perfect! Well guess what?!! Life isn't perfect Blake!! And it never will be!"

"You know what?! I don't need this bullshit right now Kara!" he starts walking away

"Where are you going?!"

"Anywhere! As long as you're not there!" he gets in his car and drives away. How does he not take this seriously? Our son is laying on a hospital bed and he still thinks he's best for them. What the hell am I supposed to do? I go back inside and see a very familiar face...

"Gail?" I call. She and I were on good terms but with everything that's been going on I don't think I'm gonna be her favorite person in the world right now. I just hope she's here to support because I really don't need another person insulting me at this moment....