Me: Now THIS! This is my speed. I am not liable to character mischaracterization. Go check out Nabi_Subedar and CelestialWhite's collab book, Love Torn by War if you haven't already! That's where the doppelgangers in this chappy come from.
Kreacher: *groans*
EB Kreacher: *screams*
Me: Haha! That's the spirit!
Me: *laughs awkwardly before spiralling back into existential thoughts - Yes, I have those, and I'm still 12*
Me: *is silent for a while*
EB Kreacher: ...Is your sister alright?
Kreacher: Probably just some troubling thoughts-
Me: WHY ISN'T DEATH THE KID FIXING HIS OWN HAIRSTYLE WHEN HE KNOWS AND IS PERFECTLY AWARE OF THE FACT THAT HIS HAIR IS ASYMMETRICAL BECAUSE OF THE WHITE STRIPES?!? THERE'S GOTTA BE SOME OTHER WAY THAN DYING IT TO CHANGE THE COLOURS! IT MAKES ME UNCOMFORTABLE! WHY KID, WHY?!
Kreacher: ...Or that.
EB Kreacher: Who's Death the Kid?
Me: *snaps fingers*
Kreacher: *disappears*
EB Kreacher: Now what?
Me: Now, you're locked in a room with my Servais while my Kreacher goes visit your Servais as you.
EB Kreacher: B-but, won't both Vaisie's find something suspicious going on?
Me: Please, they'll be oblivious. Unless Kreacher - My Kreacher, mind you - Ends up wanting to fuck up the dare (which I'll kill him for), and tells Wizzie Vaisie the truth straight off.
EB Kreacher: Would you actually kill him? Your brother, I mean.
Me: You ask too many questions.
Me: *snaps fingers*
Me: *pulls up monitors*
Me: *cracks knuckles*
Me: And, because it's a countdown special, crossovers and bOuNd tO hApPeN. I asked Nabi to choose a character from any fandom I know, and since she only knows Identity V and Hetalia out of that list...
Germany: Guten tag.
Me: Iiiiiiiiiiiit's LUDWIG!
Italy: Ve~ GERMANY! WAIT-A FOR ME!
Prussia: Hey! Jou can't go to other cool universes vithout ze awesome me!
Japan: *facepalm in the background*
Me: Nope, one of you's enough.
Me: *slams breach closed*
Germany: That vasn't very nice. Can't at least Italy come through?
Me: No.
Germany: Vhatever jou say. Hopefully Japan takes care of him.
Me: I'm sure they'll be fine! Unless England comes... Anyway! Let's stalk the two couples!
Germany: ...Vhat.
Me: Oh, right. So here's what's happening. Two couples from different universes have swapped out one of theirs to the other and now we wanna see what happens!
Germany: I'm still very confused.
Me: You'll get it later on. Let's stalk my brother first!
Germany: You have a bruder? You seem like the type to have a schwester.
Me: Eh, makes it more fun to torture. Now!
~~~~~~~
Kreacher: I fucking hate you so much, Hyla...
W Servais: Ah! There you are, Kreacher! I've been looking for you! I need you to get me-
Kreacher: Dude, hold up, it's a Sunday.
W Servais: So? When did you ever care? As I said, I need you to-
Kreacher: Go get it yourself!
W Servais: I need you to steal it.
Kreacher: Uh, no!
W Servais: *chokes Kreacher with magical grip*
Kreacher: *unfazed*
W Servais: ...You're not Kreacher.
W Servais: *throws Kreacher to a wall*
W Servais: WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO MY ERRAND BOY?!
Kreacher: The fuck am I supposed to know? Ask Nabi!
W Servais: The Subedar Werewolf? What does she have anything to do with this?
Kreacher: NOT THAT ONE!
W Servais: What do you mean, not that one? There's only one!
Kreacher: Are you really that dense when Hyla's not around?!
W Servais: Hyla? You mean, the other Kreacher's sister?
Kreacher: Wh-
Kreacher: *screeches*
Kreacher: You're kidding me! I can't outright tell you or my sister's gonna murder me again but are you seriously this dumb?
W Servais: ...Wait... So... You're...
Kreacher: What do you think you dumb fuck?
W Servais: Oh...
~~~~~~~
EB Kreacher: What am I supposed to do now?
Servais: Hey, Kreacher!
EB Kreacher: O-oh, heyyyyyyy Vaisie... What's up?
Servais: What's up with the high pitch. What's wrong?
EB Kreacher: Nothing, nothing! Nothing aT ALL!
Servais: Your aura's being weird.
EB Kreacher: Aura? Whaddya mean aura? There's nothing wrong with me at all! Nothing!
Servais: ...
Servais: EB, what are you doing here?
EB Kreacher: Wh-
Me: Okay, yeah, I should've been smarter.
Servais: Hyla, what are you- Oh. A dare?
Me: Countdown spec-
Germany: Vhat is going on? Vhy did you disappear? I had no idea vhat to do until a man in a mask vith a suitcase pointed me to jour direction!
Me: Aaaaaaaand folks I abandoned Ludwig! What a treat! Why aren't you angry?
Germany: Because I know better zhan to mess vith you. Especially after zat time jou beat up mein bruder.
Me: Oh yeah, Gilbert was being an asshole, right?
Germany: Ja.
Me: Well folks, this was a failed dare. Disappointing, I would've liked to see something more interesti-
Servais: *sighs*
Servais: *kissed EB Kreacher*
Me: -ng aND I TAKE THAT BACK INTENSE FANGIRL MODE OOOOON!
Germany: Vhat is vrong vith jou people...
Me: So, that's it! Next dare will be up soon, love you guys, and toodles!
YOU ARE READING
Identity V On Crack (COMPLETED)
FanfictionAsk or dare any character from Identity V! See the dark sides of the characters! See them get tortured in more ways than one! Everything is organized by yours truly, the daughter of the Host and the temporary host of the manor. My father needed a lo...
