Me: HEY AESOP!
Aesop: Yes, Hyla?
Me: CelestialWhite wants to know if you've ever hit someone with your coffin.
Aesop: Of course I have, I have angry moments too.
Me: Angry moments?
Aesop: Yeah, remember when I smacked Vera with the coffin?
Me: Oh yeah, that time when Vera flirted with you?
Flashback...
Vera: Aesop, why are you always so quiet?
Aesop: No one plans a murder out loud.
Vera: Ooh, who's murder are you planning?
Aesop: It's none of your business.
Vera: It's Host-chan isn't it? I'd love to join you.
Aesop: ...Are you flirting with me?
Vera: Maybe~
Aesop: *sighs*
Aesop: Have you ever heard the phrase silent but deadly?
Vera: Uh-huh, what about it?
Aesop: *takes out coffin and smacks Vera with it*
Aesop: *puts Vera's corpse in the coffin*
Aesop: *embalms Vera*
Aesop: *closes coffin and buries it*
Me: Hey Aesop, if you buried Vera, why did you embalm her?
Aesop: Just in case if you decide to resurrect her for any reason her body will be preserved.
Me: Oh, okay.
Flashback Ends
Kreacher: *jumps up from behind me*
Kreacher: Hey, what are you guys talking about?
Me: Oh, we're answering the ask Celestial gave us. She asked if Aesop ever hit someone with his coffin.
Kreacher: That happened plenty of times! Remember the time he smacked my baby?
Me: Oh, you're using nicknames now. Cute.
Aesop: Nicknames?
Me: Kreacher and Freddy. Relationship nicknames. Like how Harley Quinn calls Joker puddin'?
Aesop: Oh. So Kreacher is calling Freddy baby?
Me: Yup.
Kreacher: Do you really have to dive deeper for the readers?
Me: No, but you're starting to annoy me, so I'm going to blackmail you so that you'd shut up.
Kreacher: What can you blackmail me about?
Me(sing-song voice): Your session with Freddy last night~
Kreacher: THE FUCK?!
Me: I mean, you two were so loud I'm pretty sure the whole of Oletus Manor could hear you, but the viewers don't know about it yet.
Kreacher: o/////O
Me: Okay, you're quiet now. Kreacher was talking about the time Aesop smacked Freddy with the coffin.
Flashback...
Everyone: *talking while eating dinner*
Freddy: Ugh, I can't believe your posture. You're nothing more than a cockroach.
YOU ARE READING
Identity V On Crack (COMPLETED)
FanfictionAsk or dare any character from Identity V! See the dark sides of the characters! See them get tortured in more ways than one! Everything is organized by yours truly, the daughter of the Host and the temporary host of the manor. My father needed a lo...
