Please don't fall (Shawmila)

28

Camila's POV

That day, Shawn and I decided to watch movies, cuddled up in my bed. Of course I agreed. After some time I got pretty tired and closed my eyes to sleep.

When I opened them again, Shawn was gone and it was getting dark outside. I looked around and noticed my room. It was clean. No clothes on the floor or other things. It looked like I hadn't even been here. I slowly stood up, making sure to hold onto the small table next to my bed. After steadying myself I walked towards my bedroom door and stepped outside. It immediately smelled like food which made me a bit nauseous. I walked down to see Shawn standing in our kitchen making dinner. The table was nicely set for two people. I quietly walked up to him, putting my hands on his shoulders. He turned around and smiled at me. I gave a small smile back. "I hope you're hungry. I'm making dinner." He told me proudly, pointing at the pot which had rice in it and a pan with chicken stripes. "When did you buy this?" I asked confused, knowing that we didn't have this at home. "I went out while you were asleep. I even cleaned your room before I went out. I hope it's ok." He said shyly. "You didn't have to do that Shawn..." I said slightly embarrassed, that my best friend had to clean my room. "Mila. I wanted to. You didn't ask me to do it. I did it by myself. I know you aren't in the right state of mind at the moment. I also know that you are going on tour in six days. You needed to get your room sorted out." He said, caressing my cheek. I nodded slightly, thanking and hugging him. Then I looked back at the Stove where the food was in the making. I hadn't eaten properly in almost a week.

When the food was ready he told me to sit down and he brought the food to the table. He put a small portion on my plate and a similar small one on his own plate. He sat down in front of me and started eating, while I looked down at my plate. Again. How was I supposed to eat this?

"Mila? You ok?" Shawn asked, noticing that I hadn't even touched my food. I nodded and grabbed my fork, slowly shoving some rice on my fork. I put it in my mouth. The inner fight in me began. Voices telling me to spit this out immediately or else I would get even fatter. Voices telling me to stop eating. Telling me that if I continued eating people would hate me even more. The tears were brimming with tears but I held them in. Shawn couldn't see me since I was looking down, my hair covering my face and he was eating. I couldn't do anything though. I had to eat. He already found out about my cutting. He couldn't find out about me not wanting to eat. So I forced the food into my mouth until I had eaten a whole plate of food.

Suddenly a huge wave of nausea overcame me and I jumped up and ran to the toilet. I reached just in time to throw up into the toilet, all of the food I just ate coming out again. Maybe it was because I hadn't eaten in almost a week. I shouldn't have forced as much food into my mouth as I did. Everything came out and it overwhelmed me. Shawn stood behind me, holding my hair, which I was thankful for.

After a few minutes, when everything had come out, I just sat exhausted on the floor. Shawn kneeled down next to me, comforting me. "What was this about Mila? Was my food that bad... I'm sorry it made you sick..." He said, probably feeling guilty. "Shawn no, this isn't your fault at all. I didn't tell you this but I've been sick this past week and didn't really eat anything properly because I couldn't since I had stomach aches. I'm sorry. I guess it was just too much for the beginning." I spilled out lies, as always. But this time it was way easier. "God, Mila. You should have told me. Come, we're going back to bed and I'm gonna make you some tea so you can feel better. I have a surprise for you. " He stood up and let me clean myself up.

Up in my room, Shawn was already there in sweatpants and a white shirt. A tray with two cups of tea was on my bed and my laptop was on, the movie chosen. He had made the bed more comfortable and patted the place next to him so I could sit down. I smiled and walked over to him. He was being incredibly sweet and I really appreciated that. But I knew I couldn't give it back to him. Never. He is perfect. And what am I? A failure.

Pushing these thoughts out of my mind, I sat down next to him. It wasn't really late. It was around 7 p.m. but I was really tired. I for sure wouldn't stay awake for the movie.

A few minutes into the movie, the door bell rang. So I stood up, making my way down to the door. Shawn of course came with me, pausing the movie. When I reached the door, I made the mistake not looking through the spy hole. I opened the door, not knowing who would be on the other side...

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Sorry for this slightly shorter chapter but I needed a cliffhanger!

Tell me how you like it so far and who do you think is at the door??