Please don't fall (Shawmila)

83

I posted a new very, very, very sad book! Check it out! It's called 'Baby don't cut' and its also about Shawmila

Intense chapter ahead... I'm sorry....

Camila's POV

I was feeling tipsy by now which was strange since I usually don't get tipsy from a glass of wine. We had been here for at least an hour and as soon as I noticed how tipsy I was getting, I tried reducing my wine consume. But Matthew kind of tried to get me to drink more, since he hd payed the bottle. So we finished the bottle and I ended up giggling about the smallest things. He paid and we left and walked to his car. We sat a bit in his car, without it moving. I felt him put his hand on my thigh, which I didn't really care about in that moment. I was feeling more drunk every minute and almost passed out. "We... goin... m... house...:" was everything I heard, before my eyes closed completely with me letting out a small giggle.

I woke up again, feeling the car stop, looking at the surroundings. Matthew had taken his hands away from the steering wheel and placed one back on my thigh. But the time it bothered me, since I was feeling really tired. "Matthww... I wnt togo... homeee" I mumbled, not being able to form a completely understandable sentence. "No Camzi... I think you want to come with me." I heard him whisper, right next to my ear. "You can come and rest there." "Aigt..." I agreed, tired.... or drunk, I don't know. He walked around the car, opening my door and helping me get out, my purse was loosely hanging around my shoulder. I could barely walk and I felt like I was going to faint every moment, my eyes opening and closing. He noticed how I was struggling and picked me up bridal style, walking me to his house. I only felt him opening the door and felt him walk through the house, probably to a bed room, and laid me down on the bed, turning on the lights. I squeezed my eyes shut since the bright light was really hurting my eyes. "Well Camila, now that you're here..." I heard him again, not being able to see where he was since I had my eyes closed. "I think we could do a little something, alright?" "nooo..." I whined, my head throbbing. "Oh yess." he whispered and I felt his hands slipping my shoes off. It actually felt good, so I helped him slipping the off. I was just giggling the whole time, not realizing what was happening until his hands were placed on the zipper of my jeans. He opened it slowly. "Oh... what do we have here." he smirked, pulling my jeans down slowly, exposing my black panties. "Stop... no.." I whimpered again. "You want this... you agreed on coming here with me." he whispered again. I was unable to move since his hands were in my now exposed thighs. "Oh, some cuts... what is it Camzi?" he asked, tracing my cuts on the side of m thighs. It felt so... uncomfortable... I had only allowed Shawn to ever touch my cuts... And this was very weird. But I wasn't in the right state of mind. So I wasn't really able to do anything but let out another whimper. "Stoooop... Mathweww..." I heard a camera click, but when I looked and tried to stop him, he had already put his phone away again. Shit. He put his hands on my exposed things again going higher and higher with his hands until he reached my panties. And that's when it snapped in me. No... I would not let this happen again... I shot up, staring into Matthews dark eyes. He had his belt open already and was leaning above my body. "S- Stop... I- I don't want this...." "Oh, I think it's a little too late for that, right? Your pants are already on the floor.." he smirked, his hands wandering up to my shirt. He roughly pulled off my cardigan, exposing my still completely scarred arms. "Oh Camila... now... what do we have here?" he said, roughly tracing my arms. "Stop." I said firmly, pulling my arms again. He then grabbed my wrists tightly, hurting me. "Let me g-go..." tears started springing Tony yes, when I understood what was happening and what he wanted to do. "Oh? You suddenly don't want to be here anymore?" "N-No." "Funny... now, lean back down and lets take off your sh-" "NO!" I tried wiggling myself out of his grasp, only half succeeding. My arms were free but his body was still hovering on my thighs. "Camila, don't be stupid-" "No... stop it, let me go... now" I kicked my legs, trying to shake him off. This was not hat I was thinking when he asked me to go out with him. I stood up, as soon as he backed away from me when I hit him in between his legs, causing a groan to escape from his mouth. I quickly grabbed my cardigan, pulled in on but wasn't able to grasp my pants before running out, only my underwear. Matthew ran after me, not succeeding because I threw the door shut at him before leaving his house. I ran a bit, far away enough from his house. I had no pants on... and it was freezing outside. I don't even know what time it is. Somewhat between 12 and 5 am... I luckily was able to grab my purse with my phone. I pulled it out, calling Rob with hot tears streaming down my face.

R: Hello?

He asked tiredly since I had probably just woken him up.

C: R-Rob?... can you... can you pick me up?

R: Are you okay Camila?

He asked, suddenly sounding a lot more awake.

C: Y- yes... c-can you please come...

R: Sure. Where are you?

I told him the street in which I was him and asked him to maybe bring a blanket since it was freezing outside.

C: Alright... I'm there in 5 minutes, stay safe please.

He said before hanging up. 'Stay safe'.... I wish... I wish I was safe... I was paranoid. I felt like someone was following me...but that was probably just because I was still shocked because of what just happened. I was just minutes away from... being raped a second time... and when I realized it, I let out a loud sob. How did I agree to this? Why? Why am I always so stupid?

I heard a car pull up and saw it was Rob. He stopped the car and walked outside and walked to my side. "Camila! What happened? Why are you here in the middle of the night?" He asked worriedly, pulling me into him, his big warm body giving me a bit of comfort. "I- I ... " I was unable to talk, due to my sobs escaping my mouth. "It's okay... it's okay... come, I will take you to the apartment." I nodded as he lead me into the car, giving me a blanket since he had noticed I had no pants on, not questioning it any further, sensing how uncomfortable I was. The ride was silent, Shawn was on my mind and I was feeling incredibly guilty. Was I ever going to talk to him about this? I don't know if I will ever will be able to... it was ripping me apart... just how it ripped me apart when I actually got raped. My legs were pulled up to my chest, the blanket covering me completely and my head leaning against the window.

"We're here Camila, come on." he said, pulling me out of my thought. He had parked in the garage so I could just get into the elevator and go up to the apartment. "Thank you..." I whispered. He gave me another of his waring hugs before letting me get into the elevator with the blanket still around my body. I tapped on the button with the number 5 and emerged from the elevator as soon as the door opened. I quickly walked to our door, clumsily taking out my key, trying to get it into the hole. This felt like a dejavu... my hand was trembling just as much and I wasn't able to find the hole, so I stood next to the door, sliding down on the wall and trying to calm down. I rested my head on my knees... exactly like last time in Toronto but this time... Shawn wouldn't find me... he wouldn't be here to comfort me... he wouldn't be able to help me... No one was.

---------

Okay, this is kinda trash... I thought it would be kinda... idk... more intense but it was really bad lol... sorry