Please don't fall (Shawmila)

96

Shawn's POV

I can't even describe the anger I felt when Mila told me why she got kicked out... I honestly think... she should leave... leave this group and do her own thing. I have been thinking. this for a while now. If she would feel comfortable I would never think something like this. But I just feel how she is just... loosing herself in this group... loosing her personality. And I definitely don't want that. 

She was sleeping in my arms. It was maybe around 8pm. The others would be coming home soon. But why do I even care? I took my phone, seeing if I had any notifications. And I did. From Sinu and my parents. I first tapped on Sinus message. She told me she had sent Mila a message but she hadn't read it. I answered, telling her that she fell asleep right when she came home and that I would tell her to answer when she woke up. Then I answered my parents, telling them that I was doing good and that I miss and love them. Then my thoughts wandered back to Mila potentially leaving the group...

Camila's POV

We were done with the radio interview. There was tension in the air... I just was disconnected... disconnected from them. We were driving to the next interview in silence. Our publicist was still... mad at me... but the whole team was. I didn't even dare to look at our publicist. We parked, did the next interview and drove back home at around 6 pm. Radio interviews didn't make me as uncomfortable because people couldn't see me. I had a few questions to answer this time since we had a sheet with questions for each so it was okay. When I walked back into my room, Shawn wasn't there because he was taking a walk was taking time to talk to his family. I changed, took off my makeup and settled back into my bed with my phone. I checked social medias... and then the message from my mom... from yesterday.... 'Hey hija, how are you? Can you please call me later? Or whenever you are free? I want to talk to you, please... it's kind of important... I love and miss you.' Of course I was wondering what was so important... but I decided to call her when Shawn was here. I replied. 'Hey mama, sì, I am doing okay so far, how are you? I can call you later alright? I love you mama.' I then wanted to put away my phone when I remembered I had a message from UNKNOWN. I let out a sigh and tapped on the message.

UNKNOWN ( one day ago): Well, well... now that your little boyfriend knows about me... let's see what's coming your way Camilita.

What is coming my way? I don't even want to know... I put my phone away again, letting myself fall back into the bed, my eyes closing immediately because of how tired I feel.

I opened my eyes when I heard the door closing. "I'm sorry baby... I didn't mean to wake you up..." I tiredly rubbed my eyes, sitting up and looking over at him. "It's okay...." I mumbled still tired. He changed his clothes and sat down on the bed next to me. "How was your day baby?" he asked, leaning forward and pressing a kiss to my lips. "Exhausting..." I told him, falling back into the bed, laying on my side so I could look at him. He was cheering his phone and then I remembered I still had to call my mom. "Shawn?" "Hmm?" "My mom wanted me to call her... I wanted to wait for you... you think I could... you could..." "Do it Mila, I'm here." he smiled reassuringly, taking my hand in his. I sat up, picking up my phone from my bedside table, asking my mom per text if it was alright to call her. I waited a few minutes, Shawn holding my hand tightly, looking at my screen to wait for the answer. And after a few more minutes, it came. 'Sì hija, please call me... it is really important' Was the message. I looked up at Shawn and he was looking at me. he could tell I was worried... what was so... important that she couldn't tell me over text? I dialed her number, putting it on speaker and placing the phone down on my bed.

(SH = Shawn, S= Sinu, C= Camila)

S: Camila? Hello Hija.... are you alone?

C: Hello mama... no, I am with Shawn, is that okay?

S: Oh, yes, of course, Hello Shawn.

SH: Hello Sinu.

Then it was quiet and the only thing I heard was a quiet sigh from my mom, making me look nervously at Shawn. He gave my hand a reassuring squeeze. 

S: Camila? I have something to tell you... and it's not... pretty....

Her voice was shaky and that made me even more nervous... what is wrong?

C: Mama? Tell me... what is it?

Please... nothing with my family... please just let them all be ok... I was silently praying.

S: Camila... it's... it's your dad...

No... no, please no. 

C: What? Is he... he is okay, right?

I was still silently praying.

S: He- Camila... we've known this for some time now... I just... we just couldn't tell you right away...

I still had no idea what she was talking about.

C: What mama?

I was really worried now... it was about my papa... I love him with all my heart... if something happens to him... I don't know what I would do...

S: Camila.... he was diagnosed with cancer

My world stopped in that moment. Cancer? What? No.... How... Why? Oh my god... He was always a healthy man... never had any problems.... he was very healthy and active and-

S: Camila? Hija?

I couldn't find words... I wasn't able to talk... I felt Shawn squeeze my hand but I didn't reciprocate. I couldn't... in that moment I was feeling... numb... I could hear my mom talk to Shawn and then Shawn hung up, putting my phone away while I just sat there, looking at the wall in front of me, still processing what I had just found out. I didn't even cry, nothing. I just sat there. Shawn still held my hands but I just... I let them hand limp on my legs. "Mila?" Shawn asked after ten minutes of just sitting there. "hm?" I mumbled. "Talk to me... please..." but I didn't and shook my head. I just wanted to... burry myself right now... fall asleep and never wake up again or when I wake up.... hoping to wake up from this damn nightmare called... my life.... this is horrible.

Sometime while sitting on the bed Shawn had pulled me closer to him, laying me down with his so he was spooning me and holding me close, stroking my sides gently and pressing small kisses to my head and shoulder, trying to make me fall asleep. But I just couldn't... I didn't feel... anything right now... I just laid still in his arms, hoping he would fall asleep so he would stop worrying. 

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