Eternally His (Dazai Osamu x Reader)

His Final Decision

Your P.O.V.
I was about to hit the floor, still shocked at what just happened I couldn't stop myself from falling,

"Y/n-san!" Members called out. Of course, I was the boss' daughter, I get hurt on someone's else watch and they think Mori will pop a blood vessel or something.

Falling from four stories wasn't life threatening but if I hit the floor it was going to hurt like hell getting up. Instead of falling I heard a familiar voice shout out, "Y/n!"

Next thing I knew, I was in Chuuya's arms, as his feet lightly hit the ground. I looked up at him and blinked a few times just to make sure it was actually Chuuya and not my imagination.

"Idiot." He grumbled angrily. He wasn't wrong for someone like me, someone with my reputation, I was going to get a lot of shit for this and so will Mori. I should've never fell in the first place. I should've fought back against Nikolai. Not doing so just added a whole bunch of extra problems on top of one huge problem.

A few hours later I was summoned to Mori's office where I assumed he was going to be angry with me and lecture me. I opened the door to see him and Kouyou conversing. I watched as she excused herself, I held the door open for her, shutting it behind her.

"Are you hurt?"

I shook my head, "That's definitely not what I came for but no Chuuya managed to grab me before I hit the-"

Mori stood up, making me lose my words as my attention was focused solely on him, "Two mafiosos have come forward and said they seen the two of you engaging in conversation."

I nodded, "that's true."

I knew his patience was running thin with my actions, I knew I was causing him trouble, I knew this added onto everything else was stressing him out. I knew it all but- why? Why couldn't I put myself aside and think about him for once? He always does it for me...he could've stopped me from seeing Nikolai a long time ago but didn't.

"I'm already having them dealt with." He said calmly, which I didn't expect, then his voice took a turn, he harshly said, "however you will not be seeing Nikolai again, you understand?"

I felt a piece of myself break, another piece wanting to stand up and fight back and the rest of the pieces saying 'just let it go, he does enough for us'. Mori's put so much on the line just for my happiness even if it's a minute or two. He's stuck his neck out for me even when he shouldn't have.

The very least I could do was respect his given decision, not as my boss, but as my father. I nodded slowly then said, "I fully understand." I turned around and walked to the door, when I began turned the knob, I said in a shaky voice, "excuse me."

While I was walking out, it was very faint but I heard him whisper, "it's for your own good." Nikolai wanted the same thing huh? For me not to get branded as a double agent? For Mori not to have to kill me? Mori didn't want that either. It was only then did I realize how much Nikolai reminded me of Mori. (MEGA OOF TO NIKOLAI)

It hurt, it really did but I understood why. Nikolai was never to be seen around me again, I could only imagine the things Mori would do if he were. He'd honestly probably try to kill him, I don't know.

Mori's handling my problem, I walked to find Aku, then seen him in the torture chamber, "huh?"

I watched from afar, "You two have been accused of treason."

"It's not us! It was Y-"

Aku silenced them immediately in case of any onlookers, he coughed then began to walk up the stairs, I acted as if I just got there, "Hey Aku."

He looked at me then ruffled my hair, he walked past me, then said, "don't continue to cause Mori pain if you clearly see he's in pain because of your horrible decision making."

That was the first time Aku's ever scolded me. I blinked a few times in surprise when I turned around Aku was already turning the corner. He knew I was causing Mori pain.

He was right...I was causing him pain knowingly yet I didn't stop myself. Mori always goes the extra mile for me I wonder how he feels knowing I won't do the same. Will he finally stop protecting me? Then what?

I sat on the steps of the torture chamber, thinking while watching the people who snitched on me bleed out. I thought it would be best to see him one more time and explain everything that's happened thus far and then see what he says. He'll probably say something like, "it's good someone's thinking with their head and not their heart." or something stupid like that.

I wonder what Mori would say if he found out I saw him again right after he told me not to. Before I stop seeing him, I want to at least tell him why I can't see him anymore. I think it's unfair to just leave him like that.

That's when I realized, Nikolai and I never tried to hide our friendship and that itself was an issue to both of our organizations.

Out of curiosity, I called B/f, "can we meet up and talk? I have something I want your opinion on." He thinks more like me, so maybe he'll produce an answer I can be comfortable with.

"Right, the usual spot in 15?"

"Yea." I said standing up, already making my way there.

This is stressing me out.
———————————————————————
it's is 5:45 in the morning....5:45! WHO WAKES UP AT 5 IN THE MORNING? me apparently, my sleep schedule is absolute ass but that's alright. i'm still debating whether or not i should do a nikolai book but then again it's already enough with this one, i feel really lazy on some days and if you actually read these notes, i have made it known that i'm not in the best mindset. school was really the only thing that distracted me from depression so nice to know i probably won't go back. given all that, i'm not sure if i can handle another book, but i'll still think about it, thank you~ goodbye~