Looking Back

Chapter 6

Avery

I held my breath as I overheard their conversation.

"There was never a right time. At first, I thought it was just transferred feelings from my grief...then, well then, I felt like I was disrespecting Fiona's memory. Now she has you, Vic. She's crazy about you. No way I'm taking that away from either of you."

Victor sighed, "I'm not crazy about the idea of letting her go, but she has a right to know at least. What happens if she's loved you all this time as well and you both miss out?"

"What are you two conspiring about over here?" I asked.

Victor jumped, "Shit, you scared me. You're as quiet as this guy."

Luke grinned widely and put his arms around me, "Taught her everything I know."

"Yeah right, ask Victor, I was sneaky when I was a kid," I smirked. "I used to steal his shoes. He can't walk on rocks for anything."

He gaped, "That was you? I yelled at my cousin non-stop for a week about that." I couldn't hold it in any longer and broke out in big belly laughs as he grabbed me around the waist and planted a wet, sloppy kiss on my cheek. "Brat."

"Ewww," Erin groaned, making all three of us laugh. "Wait, how come Victor kisses Mama Avery but you don't Daddy?"

Luke's cheeks turned red and he stammered, "Well honey..."

I felt Victor nudge me and whisper, "Do what feels right, baby." When I met those fiery eyes I knew he understood and I nodded. Before Luke could say anything else, I leaned over and kissed him softly.

When the kiss broke, his eyes had tears and were glazed. "Daddy's just shy sometimes, Erin."

She giggled wildly and ran off singing loudly, "Mama and Daddy kissed! Mama and Victor kissed!"

Luke continued to look at me, "Why did you do that?" I could hear the confusion in his voice.

"I've waited too long for you to work up the courage, and someone knew I needed to," I said and looked back at Victor.

"Told you," he smirked at Luke. "I think maybe I should go home and let you two talk."

I gripped his hand before he could move, "No. I don't want either one of you to leave, please." I looked between them frantically, now second-guessing the kiss. I'd been in love with Luke since before he and Fiona even married, but now, well now, I was just as in love with Victor. Could I really choose?

"Hey, it's okay, I just want the two of you to have a chance to talk. I'm not letting you go, baby," Victor said with a confident smile. My shoulders relaxed. "How about I clean up breakfast and the two of you go to the parlor?" I gave Luke a questioning look and then took his hand when he nodded. With a quick kiss on Victor's cheek, I led Luke into the other room.

We sat for a few moments awkwardly then I blurted, "I'm sorry if I shouldn't have kissed you."

He grabbed my hands, "Don't ever apologize for that." His eyes held me captive as he continued, "Av, I've wanted to kiss you for so long now, I've just been afraid. Afraid you didn't feel the same, afraid of losing you like I lost Fiona." He let out a breath, "Can I kiss you again?"

"Yes, please," I answered. He cupped my face and gently pulled our mouths together. Unlike the first kiss, there was no hesitation this time as we both readily responded. His fingers wove into my hair, tugging gently. When his lips left mine and trailed along my neck, I let out a soft moan and blushed.

He chuckled softly, "I like that sound." My cheeks darkened even more. He cupped my chin again, "I know how much you care about Victor. I don't want to come between you, but damn, Avery, I want a chance too."

"I don't know how to choose," I said feeling like I wanted to cry.

"Then don't," Victor's deep voice said as he walked into the room. "I'm sure you already know about our previous relationship, yes?"

I nodded. Luke had told me and Fiona about Sang. He'd explained how all nine of them had dated her, but they were so young then. "This isn't a high school crush. How would it work?"

Victor gave a soft laugh, "Maybe he didn't give all the details, then." I raised my eyebrows as this time, Luke's cheeks reddened. "Not all of us were intimate, but it was not an innocent relationship, Avery. That's actually part of the reason I had to leave."

"Wait, what?" Luke said quickly.

I sighed. "Long story short, my parents found leverage. Somehow had proof that Sean and Owen had fooled around with Sang while she was still underage. They threatened all sorts of things. With all the people they had in their pockets - doctors, lawyers, judges - they could have hurt all of you. They even got Kota's dad a parole hearing, man. If I agreed to marry Olivia and keep supporting them, they would bury it all. The only catch was I couldn't tell any of you. That's why I left."

"Holy shit, Vic," Luke gaped. "You did that for us?"

Victor's eyes watered, "I had to. You all are the only real family I ever knew. I couldn't let them destroy you, Luke." Watching the two of them hug, I knew what I wanted, I just didn't know how. I squeezed Victor's hand and he looked at me. "I know what I'm suggesting is different, but if you haven't noticed we're both in love with you."

"I want to try, but I also want to be careful for Erin's sake. Not to mention, I'm leaving for term next week," I said.

"That might be a good thing actually," Luke said. "We can take things slow and get to know each other again - not just you and me, but me and Victor as well. We can come up for some weekends either together or individually and see how it goes, okay?"

I giggled, "For a man who freaked out a few minutes ago about me kissing him, you certainly seem to have thought this through awful quickly."

"Baby, if it gives me the chance to love you like I want, I'll move heaven and earth," he purred, then kissed me again as Victor just laughed.  

Author's Notes: I'm on term break so updates will be fairly consistent at first.  Let me know your thoughts, my lovelies.

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