Looking Back

Chapter 13

Kota

"Ms. Dorman, how can I help you?" She stood in my doorway looking pale. "Are you alright?" I quickly walked toward her and took her arm as I guided her toward a chair. Her skin felt clammy, her cheeks flushed.

"I'm sorry, sir, but I don't think I can take today's classes. All of the prep is done, but I'm not feeling well," she said, her voice shaking slightly.

I handed her a water bottle, asking, "Is there someone I can call to pick you up? Your boyfriend perhaps?"

She took a long sip then shook her head, "No. He's back home. I...I can walk. I'll be fine." One look at her told me she wouldn't be.

"I'll drive you, I insist." When she tried to protest, I put my hand over hers, "Ms. Dorman, you're obviously unwell and shouldn't be walking in this weather. I promise to be strictly professional."

She gave me a weak smile and relented. I grabbed my coat and put it around her shoulders as I led her down to my small car. If it hadn't been raining this morning, I would have walked to campus myself. I remember she said she didn't have class on Tuesdays. Did she walk all this way, just to cancel her TA duties? She stumbled a bit as we walked, and I pulled her closer to me. I expected her to protest, but when she didn't I realized just how poorly she felt. I fastened her seatbelt and climbed into my seat. "Can you give me your address?"

She directed me to a small row of flats near St. Stephen's Green Park. "I'm above the shops, thank you, Dr. Lee. I'll be fine from here," she said, undoing her buckle.

I shook my head, "I'd feel safer if you let me walk you up. You aren't very steady on your feet and the last thing we need is you falling down the stairs." I flashed her a playful grin, making her smile in return.

Once again she allowed me to steady her as we climbed the steps. She dug in her pockets, retrieving her keys. Once she'd unlocked the door, I nudged her forward, not wanting to leave until she was safely inside. "I'd offer you something, but I don't think I could stand long enough to make a decent cuppa," she said, giving a half laugh, "Sorry."

I took the coat from her shoulders and smiled, "You don't need to take care of me, Ms. Dorman. Now, may I help you to your room? I will lock the door behind me once I know you're asleep."

Her eyes blinked in surprise then she mumbled, "Um...thank you." I took her arm and let her guide me. It was a simple room with a small bath attached. Books and notebooks littered the bed and floor. I helped her sit on the edge of the bed as I gathered her things and sat them on the nightstand. I noticed a picture of a brown-eyed girl and commented, "She's cute."

"That's my god-daughter," she answered, then yawned. "Sorry."

"Stop apologizing," I said softly, then took off her shoes and helped her into the bed. I pulled the covers around her as her eyelids grew heavy.

"Thank you," she mumbled as she drifted off.

Walking back to the small kitchen, I pulled out a water bottle and some aspirin then set them on the nightstand along with my phone number and a note to call if she needed anything. The girl's photo caught my eye again and I had the strangest feeling I'd seen her before. Avery mumbled and shifted in her sleep, drawing my attention. Seeing a stuffed panda that seemed to have fallen off the bed, I picked it up, placing it near her hands. She instantly pulled it to her chest, letting out a soft hum.

I sighed, leaning down, and pressed a gentle kiss to her head, "Oh what I wouldn't give, beautiful girl. Rest." Then I quietly slipped out of the apartment, securing the lock behind me before heading back to teach class.

****

I sat at my desk looking over the responses from today's classes. I was amazed. Avery had taken a basic course in ethics and morphed it into a globally-minded course encompassing age-old and modern-day ethical issues. Despite being mostly first years, the students were rising to the challenge she placed before them, diving in without fear of getting wrong answers, but instead finding their voice and taking clear stances on matters as well as openly conceding when they were proven wrong. I was beyond impressed.

When I picked up one essay, however, I found myself struggling. The student had written about a family trauma that tore her family apart. Too many details rang in my head, similar to my days in the Academy. Of course, that was before it all fell apart. Part of me wanted to still hate Victor for driving Sang away and abandoning us, but looking around my office I had to wonder if I would have ever followed this path if I had stayed in Charleston, or with the Academy for that matter. Would any of us have found the lives we have now? Would it have been better or worse?

The silver case of my cell phone caught my attention and I opened the screen, then closed it quickly. I did this several more times before finally dialing the number Jess had sent so many weeks ago.

"Hello?" a familiar voice spoke. I could hear a small child's laugh in the background and the deep baritone of Victor's laughter.

Working up my courage, I answered, "Hey Luke, it's Kota." I'm not sure what I was expecting, but it definitely wasn't the ear-piercing shriek that I heard.

"Holy shit! Kota, oh my gods, I'm so glad you called. How are you - where are you?" he rambled.

I laughed, "Well, other than needing a hearing test now, I'm good."

He chuckled, "Yeah, um sorry. I guess my daughter is rubbing off on me. I've got the girl-squeal down to a science. So what are you up to now? Are you still at Cambridge? How are Jess and Mama?"

He did sound a lot like an overexcited child, but then again, Luke was always hyper. "Actually, Jess gave me your number via North. I'm in Dublin now, just took a position at Trinity. It's kinda weird being the professor," I chuckled. "Jess is still in New York. She and Landon still just have the two boys, and Mama is still in Charleston as I'm sure you know. I heard North and Silas were coming over for the holidays."

"Yeah, I'm house-sitting for my girl, and of all the crazy surprises, Victor lives next door in his grandma's old place," Luke said.

"What, no mansions for the concert pianist," I scoffed.

"Kota, there's a lot you don't know, man. It wasn't what we thought, but it's not my place to tell you, it's his." The line went quiet for a moment, and then he said, "Hey, why don't you come for Christmas too? Owen and Sean are joining us as well, and that way I can introduce you to my gal. Not to mention we have a four-year-old with my energy to entertain us. However, I warn you, she makes Gabe look like a novice when she pulls out the hairbows," he chuckled.

"I'll try," I said. "I'm up to my neck in papers and doctoral candidates. I have to cut another ten before the break. I swear it's worse than firing people."

"Yeah, can't say I envy you, man. Hey, I gotta run, Erin needs her bath, but seriously, Kota, come to Christmas. I'll send you the address. You can drive or take the train, you pick. It was really good to hear from you," Luke said.

"You too, Luke," I said and hung up.