Elenore

Chapter 70

---Elenore's P.O.V.---

"W-what do you mean 'Griffin is dead'?! He's not... He can't really be dead... Right!? I mean, this is Griffin we're talking about! He can outsmart anyone. Griffin can't be-" I was cut off by Lucy, pulling me in for a tight hug. It was then that I noticed that tears were not only falling from her face, but off of mine as well.
'I'm crying?'
I wrapped my arms around her and we stayed like that for a while, crying silently. It didn't feel like it was real, loosing a friend like Griffin. Surely he could've came up with some way for them all to leave, right?
'I have to stop questioning everything. He's gone, there's nothing we can do to bring him back. I need to just accept it. Death is not a new subject for me. Everyone dies eventually, so why do I feel so down? Just because I knew him? Because he was a friend? After all, he is just another human being, and we all pass on some day.'
These words didn't sound like me, how could I think like that? I've known him since we were little, he was one of my best friends and yet... I wasn't as sad as I thought I would be. In fact, I felt at peace. Why? Why am I barely affected by his death? I should be mourning as I did for my mother, but all I did was cry for a few short minutes. Everyone else is still distraught and I feel almost indifferent. 'Ve deserves more of me, why can't I bring myself to cry?! I'm at his funeral for God's sake!'
I took a deep breath and began making my way to the casket to read the speech I prepared last night after Lucy told me everything. There were a lot of people I've never seen before, and even they were crying.
I cleared my throat and began.
"Griffin was an amazing friend, and it's tragic that he has passed. I believe however, though I don't know exactly what happened due to the fact that I wasn't there, that it was for the greater good. He gave his life so others could live, and I can't imagine the pain he had gone through to make that possible. I-" I stopped. 'What now? This speech is terrible so far... Think of something better! You practiced all night and now you choke!?'
"I- I really don't know what to say. I feel like I've known him my whole life and now that he's gone... It just doesn't seem right. He was so passionate about everything he did! In fact, I remember just how badly he wanted to be my friend when we were young." I let out a small chuckle, "He said that he wouldn't live another day if I declined to be his friend. We were probably only 5, and he was already so dramatic." I felt my eyes well up as I spoke, recalling the past. "If I could go back to that moment, I would stall for as long as possible, just to tease him. It was so funny though, how he woulda always come up to me in the mornings and ask again and again until one day, I gave in. After that, he wouldn't leave me alone for a second! Lucy had to step in sometimes just so that I could use the restroom and be sure he wouldn't follow me in." I looked to Lucy and saw her let out a small chuckle, wiping a tear from her face. "He was really protective too, anytime another boy would come up to me, he would chase them off and say that I was his friend first. It took months for Ciel to even be able to come up and have an actual conversation with me." the crowd collectively laughed for a brief second, waiting for me to tell another story. "I think his greatest trait though, was that he was always kind and determined. No matter the cost, he would protect the ones he loved most. It seems that he's finally paid the ultimate price, but I'm sure he's happy with the decision he's made and I bet he's smiling and laughing with us wherever he is. With that, I'll leave off with a final goodbye." I walked closer to his casket, placing a soft kiss on his cheek and leaving a red rose beside him. Other people had made speeches as well, then following my actions. When it was all said and done, we lowered the casket into the ground, then Lucy, Wendy, Gray, Summer, Ciel, Maura, Jacob, and myself all grabbed a handful of dirt, thowing it in together and watching as the rest of the dirt was shoveled on by the others.
Even after all this, I still felt like it was missing something, the funeral was lacking. This wasn't good enough.
Shaking, terrified of what I was about to do, I took a deep breath and closed my eyes.

"Amazing Grace, how sweet the sound,
That saved a wrench like me.
I once was lost, but now I'm found,
Was blind, but now I see."

I opened my eyes and looked around, when I continued, Ciel joined in.

"T'was Grace that taught my heart to fear,
And Grace my fears relieved.
How precious did that Grace appear,
The hour I first believed."

Now Maura, Gray, Wendy, and Lucy joined, encouraging others as well.

"Through many dangers, toils, and snares,
Bright shining as the sun.
'Tis Grace that brought me here thus far,
And Grace will lead me home.

The Lord has promised good to me,
His word my hope secures.
He will my shield and portion be,
As long as life endures.

Yeah when this flesh and heart shall fail,
And mortal life shall cease.
I shall possess within the veil,
A life of joy and peace.

When we've been there ten thousand years,
Bright shining as the sun.
We've no less days to sing God's praise,
Then when we've first begun."

'I hope you're happy, Griffin. Maybe one day I'll see you again.
For now though, I'll miss you.
Goodbye, old friend.'