How Could This Be Real?

98. You Don't Need Me

"I can't do this, Angel, I just can't," David mumbled, burying his face in his hands.

I gently rubbed his back in small circles and shooshed him, murmuring reassurances into his ear. We were sitting in the airport, waiting for his plane to arrive and he was barely holding himself together. I glanced out the large windows, watching the planes endlessly take off and land, bringing people away from or to their homes. My mind wandered to last night and the short day that had led us to where we were now.

David had driven us back to my house after our time in the woods and I'd fallen asleep in the passenger's seat. He'd carried me inside and I'd found out that my dad had talked to him for a minute, which explains why I thought I heard voices in my dream. We'd put our clothes back on before we started driving though, so it's not like he caught us naked or anything, but I was pretty sure he knew what we'd been getting up to. School had been tough because during breakfast, David told me that he'd booked his flight for that evening, so he was all I could think about. I was so concerned, now that I knew how much our partings affected him. Mindy bugging me about my romantic rendezvous didn't help either. My dad agreed to drive us to the airport since I'd need a ride back home, so at the moment he was waiting outside in the car. And that's how we got here, to this horrible position of sadness and devastation.

I finally pulled my gaze away from the window and settled it on my lover's hopeless form. He was hunched over, his elbows propped on his knees and his face hidden in his palms. I could hear him sniffling and choking back sobs, his shaky breathing racking my body like an earthquake. I scooted closer to him and draped my arm across his back, laying my head on his shoulder.

"It's okay," I cooed. "Everything is going to be alright. You're strong, you don't need me. And besides, before you know it, we'll be back together again. The time will just fly by, it always does."

A sob escaped his lips and he turned to me, pulling me into his body and digging his face in my hair. I could tell he was trying to hold me tightly, but he was so weak that I hardly felt his arms around my figure. "I-I-I d-do n-n-need y-you," he stammered, his shoulders shuddering.

I stroked the hair on the back of his head and whispered, "I'll be just a call away. One push of a button and I'm there, you know that. Plus all your videos and pictures..."

"They aren't enough," he cried, nuzzling further into me. "Nothing is enough! Nothing except you. I need you. Please, don't make me leave." He was begging me, pleading to stay, and it broke my heart even more than it already was. It was ridiculously hard to hold myself together, let alone try to keep him from completely breaking down. This whole time, I've been holding back tears, fighting to not let my voice crack and show him how difficult this was for me too.

"I'll always be with you," I said quietly. "You have my heart. Just look inside and I'll be there. That's all it takes."

"You make it sound so easy," he muttered. "It's not, though. Not in the slightest. It's the hardest thing I've ever had to do, being away from you. I can't do it. I-I c-can't..." The sobs started overtaking him again and a tear of my own slipped down my cheek. I nudged my face against his hair, letting the strands wipe away the rebel tear.

"Yes, you can," I forced out. "I'm just one part of your life, you need to focus on the others."

"How many times do I have to tell you?! You're all I think about! I can't focus on anything if you're not around! I'm always stuck in my head, stuck in memories of you. You aren't just a part of my life, Angel. You are my life."

I took a deep breath, careful not to let it waver, and gently pushed him away, holding his shoulders so that he was looking into my eyes. His despairing expression just about made me lose it, but I somehow managed to hang onto my sense with just a thread. "No, your life is YouTube, your subs, your friends and family. They need you too. I know you might not want to sometimes, but you just have to keep going. You can't just drop everything for me, everything you've worked for and achieved. You need to give those things just as much love as you do to me."

He cupped my cheek in his palm, tears streaming down his face. "That stuff isn't important to me anymore. You're the only thing I care about, the only thing I live for. I can't live without you."

I closed my eyes in a lame attempt to hold back my tears, but they started flowing anyway. I brought my hand up and wrapped it around his, pressing into the warmth it was giving me. "You don't have to. I'll always be here, right here waiting for you. You'll always have me, you know there's no question about that." I kissed his palm and murmured against it, "Even though we might be oceans apart, we'll still be together. Not physically, but in every other way."

"But I need you physically," he whimpered.

I shook my head, "You're just telling yourself that you do. Push that state of mind away and instead, think that all you need is my voice. Hearing me will get you through, that's all you need to think. If you can do that, it'll feel like we're together."

"Is that what you do?" he asked, sniffling.

"Mhmm," I hummed, finding it difficult to get words out.

I heard him sigh and he leaned into me again, his lips grazing my cheek. "I'll try it," he mumbled.

I turned my head and murmured against his ear, "I love you, Charming. I truly love you."

I felt his lips form a small smile on my cheek and a wave of relief washed over me, just from that one little movement. "Truly love..." he breathed. "Yes... truly loved by your true love." He chuckled faintly, "It's perfect." His finger traced my chin and delicately turned my face to him. I peeked my eyes open and matched his tender smile. "I truly love you, Princess," he purred, and brushed our lips together. I softly kissed him back, pouring as much feeling into my movements as was humanly possible.

"Attention everyone, you may now line up to board," said a woman's voice over his shoulder.

He whined in protest and tried to kiss me harder, but I reluctantly pushed him away. I glanced out the window again and saw the plane already hooked up to the building and ready to go. How I hadn't heard the roar of the engines when it pulled up, I don't know, but it was time for him to leave.

I looked into his worried blue eyes one last time and forced a reassuring smile. "I'll see you real soon, okay?" I said, not being able to stop my voice from breaking.

He nodded slightly and swept his lips against mine one last time, whispering another 'I love you' before he stood up and slowly ambled onto the aircraft.

I sat there for a few more minutes, just staring at the shiny white wings that were about to carry him miles away. It finally coasted out to the runway and as it gathered speed, the pressure in my chest kept mounting until I was sure I would simply implode. Once it took off and was out of sight, I forced myself to stand and make my way outside, mindlessly walking to where we'd parked.

"Hey, you were in there for quite a while," my dad said once I'd sat down and closed the door.

"I watched the plane take off," I mumbled, staring at the sky as if I might catch another glimpse of it.

He must have noticed my sad tone, or maybe it was my crestfallen expression, because he asked gently, "Are you okay?"

"Yeah..." I whispered. My hollow body begged to differ however. After a few moments, my eyes slipped shut and I muttered, "No..."

His hand slid across my back and he pulled me into a comforting hug. I gratefully wrapped my arms around him, finally letting my sobs come out. I'd held them in for so long that now I wasn't sure they'd ever be able to stop. He didn't seem to mind, though. He just kept stroking my hair and my back, telling me it would be alright. I wanted to believe him so badly, but I just felt so terrible right now that I wondered if it really would be okay. I felt so empty, so lost, so alone, and it had only been maybe ten minutes without him. I didn't know if I could go on like this, but I knew I had to try, for David if nothing else.

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Yay, more depressing airport stuff XD I'm so creative :P The song is "Right Here Waiting" (anyone catch that reference?) by Richard Marx. This dude was literally my childhood. My mom was obsessed with him so I know practically all of his songs. I even went to one of his concerts like six years ago (oh boy I'm old lol) and heard him sing this song live. So, yeah, he was a big part of my life.

Thanks for reading peoples ;) ☮ Peace ☮ - Elsie