To Love Again

Sound of Silence

I just had to get this chapter in because of Friday the 13th and being that it was full moon the other day. Bad combo! Work was hell, so to speak and I got home, hurriedly finished this chapter to commemorate my intact sanity! Anyway, enjoy.

Strong and suggestive language used. Unedited. Thank you!

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Richard headed to the kitchen and out of habit turned on the monitor to Bella's room. For a minute, just for a minute, when he realized what he did, he remained motionless, watching the monitor and seeing nothing. No movement, no sound coming from the room. Just pure silence. This piercing pain twitched in his heart, feeling the loss of the daughter he's had for almost 2 years. That's when he realized that Bella would've been celebrating her 2nd birthday in a week and a half. If she was still alive. But she's not. The emptiness of her room proved that. Richard remained looking at the monitor for another few minutes, just coming to terms with the fact that Bella truly was gone. Then he took a deep breath, shook off the melancholy he was feeling and proceeded to cook breakfast for the one person that decided to stay in his life. His Maine. Yeah, my Maine.

It's funny how the pain of someone's loss can be easily replaced with happiness when the right person comes with it. Richard knows for sure, that if Maine wasn't right here, right now, he probably would still be cooped up in his room, drowning in bottles of expensive alcohol, wallowing in self pity. That was how he had coped with his pain before. When his mother and brother passed away. He used to keep everything in. Being the man, stoic and expressionless. Even if he was screaming on the inside. But now? Now that Maine is with him, sleeping in his bed, he doesn't even have the remote urge to drink. Not one bit. So this is what it feels like to have someone to share your grief with. It's bearable, it's tolerable and it's not debilitating. All he can think of is to take care of that woman who holds his heart in her hands and his child in her womb.

Whoa! My child in her womb! That sounds aaaaahhhh, daunting and scary. My child! Never did I ever think I would say that! Damn! It actually feels liberating. Yes! Maine is carrying my child in her womb! That's right! My child! And so the mighty Richard Faulkerson Jr. has fallen from his perch. But he will be the first to admit that his fall was glorious and he enjoyed every minute of it, every single bit! Because I am going to be a father! With that thought, Richard did a happy jig around the kitchen, looking like a child who was given a bag of candy after begging for it.

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Richard placed the finishing touches to the breakfast he had prepared and as he was about to head to his bedroom to wake up Maine, he was stopped short because of the sound he heard coming from the monitor. He ran to the monitor to witness Maine as she caressed Bella's bed, picked up the folded blanket and sniffed it, then took Bella's favourite stuffed toy to bring it close to her chest. She then sat on the rocker and started to rock herself at the same time, cry silently but unsuccessfully because Richard could still hear her muted sobs. He slowly walked to Bella's room with a cup of tea for Maine in his hand.

Maine was sobbing silently on the rocker, hugging Bella's stuffed toy so tightly when she noticed Richard standing by the doorway. Once their eyes met, Richard moved closer, sat on the ottoman in front of the rocker before handing Maine her mug of tea.

"Hey love. What's the matter? Talk to me."

"I just feel so bad, so guilty for not being there at her funeral. It was something I promised I wouldn't do but I broke that promise at the first sign of trouble. I ran so fast. I'm so sorry princess" Maine explained in between her sobs and hiccups that Richard had to listen carefully to be able to understand.