𝐄𝐘𝐄 𝐂𝐀𝐍𝐃𝐘

89 | lighter

Elena's POV

Ever since Yoongi left, the rest of the day was pretty uneventful, considering that all I did was lay in bed, safely tucked under the covers with my laptop on my covered lap and my back leaned against the headboard watching Netflix. 

Normally, I wouldn't spend my day slugging in bed doing absolutely nothing productive, but I can't find myself focusing on my everyday tasks even if I wanted to with those excruciating sharp pains that shoot through my lower abdomen and the brutal throbbing that has settled on my lower back. Why, oh why does a woman have to suffer through such torment just because her body hasn't fulfilled it's biological destiny? 

I've taken a few painkillers throughout the day, which proved to be effective for the first hour until my body decided to take revenge on me again by striking at my lower belly even harder than before. I swear, being on your period is like being beaten up down to the curb repeatedly and what's worse, the torture won't end for the next two to three days. I'm extremely thankful to my best friend who gave up his morning classes just to get me my medicine and some snacks from the nearest convenience store. He even kept me company for a while until I fell back to sleep. If it weren't for Yoongi, I would be a mess. And now thanks to him I'm feeling less of a mess. My cramps were so intense that I had to call in sick at the Golden Closet and miss a day's worth of pay.

In all honesty, I'm kind of grateful for being cooped up in my apartment, despite the numerous responsibilities that are piling up on the sidelines and the demons that are catching up on me. For the first time in a long time, I've gotten the opportunity to enjoy being a little lazy and just let myself go. I literally look like a homeless in my over-sized hoodie and loose sweats. My bun looks like a greasy ass meatball and if you look closely you might see some chocolate stains on my cheeks and on my clothes. Physically I guess you could say I'm relaxed and refreshed, but I guess I can't say that mentally I'm far from feeling tranquil. With everything that has happened in such a short time frame, I feel like my head is going to explode. 

I charged my phone earlier and read through the tens and tens of messages that Jungkook sent me during the weekend. I don't have the heart nor the mind to reply to him much less start a normal conversation with him at the moment, especially since I'm at a pretty fragile state, biologically speaking. I know that eventually, he and I need to have a serious talk, but the last thing I want to do right now is to deal with my boyfriend' fear of confrontation. Besides, he's the one who fought tooth and nail to push me away. I have too much on my plate right now, given what is going to happen with my position as a stripper at the Golden Closet. 

All I want to do is sleep my life away. I'm so sick of having to deal with all these responsibilities and all the dept. 

I own you, Seokjin said. 

I don't belong to anyone. 

My lip gets trapped under my teeth as my phone buzzes once more. The screen lights up what seems to be like the hundredth message from Jungkook. 

Okay, maybe I do belong to a certain someone. 

If it weren't for me, you would have nothing. You'd still be crawling in the dirt with empty hopes and dreams while everyone around you used you to their own advantage, because this is the world you live in. If you don't have power, you can't go anywhere. And a woman like you has no where to hide. No where to run. Which is why we're here right now. Seokjin's words run through my mind like echoes in a narrow tunnel, causing this bitter feeling rise in my stomach. 

I want to fade away. 

As long as he has that cctv footage of me and Jungkook, I will never be free. He's holding that as a chip over my head, just so that he can have me under his control. In my Eye Candy facade, I lure much more customers into the Golden Closet like no other stripper. I don't really know if it's right to take pride in that, but this job keeps me fed so it sure does count for something. However, the point is that Seokjin is well aware that I am the moneymaker in the nightclub, therefore its enough of a reason to choose me as one his whores to work at the Empire, since I'll be basically heightening the cash flow in his 'side business'. I'm the perfect pawn for the Empire's extension.