Sirius Black | Omnia Vincit Amor ✓

Chapter 34: Stupid Letters & Corridor Breakdowns

~ Mathilda POV ~

Christmas was lovely and so was New Years Eve, it was just my family and I, but I still enjoyed it a lot and before I knew it was already time to go back to school. It really was good to be away for some time to not always have to see him or think about him and also deal with other problems.

The following days back at school were kind of strange. I still thought about Sirius a lot and he sometimes gave me a questioning or concerned look and I had no idea what that meant. I tried to avoid looking over to the Gryffindor table or even sat with my back turned towards them. I knew even if he showed a bit of interest in me there would never be more between us.

But honestly would he choose me if all those pretty and skinny girls with so much experience are practically drooling over him?

It was currently Friday after dinner and I was on my way to the Owlery checking if my father had written me another letter. Since some time before Christmas, he constantly wrote to me expressing his disappointment and that I should really reconsider whose side I would choose if I had to. I did not want to read them, but at the same time I also did, slightly hoping that he may apologised in on of the letters, maybe saying he was wrong or whatever.

When I stepped outside the castle I was hit by the cold evening air and small snow flakes fell on my skin. I walked up to the Owlery and was immediately greeted by happily chirping owls ready to have the letters they brought taken or to give them a letter for delivery. I walked up to that familiar looking owl my dad had and grabbed the letter he was holding. I quickly patted his head and told him thank you, before he left.

With the letter in my hand I made my way back to the castle. When I was walking through the empty corridors, it was already close to curfew so not many people were around. I suddenly heard voices arguing or rather screaming. I did not want to interrupt their discussion, but there was no other way were I could walk so I slowed down a bit trying to make out who was arguing. What I heard when I slowly looked around the corner hurt me in my chest.

"I hate you. No, I despise you. Where were you? Huh? Where were you? I was, I am all alone in this place! Just at least on Christmas you could habe been there! No you left us! You left me! A brother does not do something like this! You disgust me!" Regulus screamed at his brother, tears running down his face.

"Regulus! I told you to leave, too. I asked you to come with me! I wanted you to join me! The Potters would have taken you in as well! You are my brother and you will always be. You can still leave them! And move in with me," Sirius said calmly, trying to grab his brother's arm.

I really did not want to watch, but I did not know where else to go.

"But you are not my brother anymore!" Regulus shouted before ripping his hand out of Sirius grip, turning around and storming off. "REGULUS!" he shouted while trying to chase after him, but Regulus was already gone and it probably wouldn't have changed anything if he followed him. Regulus was so outrageous I had never seen him like that.

I pondered about what I should do next. I could obviously not casually walk straight past him right now and then I saw it. He suddenly slid down on the wall, pulling his knees to his chest while burying his face into his hands.

I had never seen Sirius Black like that. He always seemed rather stern, emotionless and cocky.

This scene right then gave me quite some flashbacks to when I found Regulus in year four crying about Sirius. Anguish and torturing pain coated my insides, making me want to hug him and not let him go for hours.

Why was it always me who had to find the Black brothers at their worst?

Without much thinking I quickly approached him which he didn't notice at first, until I sat down next to him, placing a hand on his knee. His knee felt bony but warm under my palm, and I slowly smoothed my thumb over the side of it.