56. His worst three days ever

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She was home. Home, on his chest, feeling him breathe and feeling his heartbeats slow down after their lovemaking. She had been groachy with herself for missing him so badly during these three days she'd managed to stay away from him. And she got angry when she admitted to herself that she would always forgive him. Most things, but not everything. Uh uh. Of course she wouldn't let him know that. And she was going to make sure that he understood that he couldn't fix everything with sex. Nope. Even if he hadn't. He had actually talked to her and what they just had had, or...had made, done or whatever, wasn't just sex. It had been pure love. Pure lovemaking between two desperate persons who loved each other with all their hearts. She sighed and nuzzled up at his neck, just underneath his beard.

 She sighed and nuzzled up at his neck, just underneath his beard

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Can hummed and squeezed her against him. He couldn't get enough of her. Her smell, her soft skin, her dark, silky hair...everything. He needed her so badly that it scared him. He put a swift kiss on her forehead.
They were on their favorite spot; on the rug, watching the sun rise over the rooftops in Istanbul.

He wondered if she finally had understood how deep his feelings really were for her. He recalled what he had said to her earlier, when he had stopped moving inside her.

"Sanem...I've told you before, but I will tell you again. You are my everything, e-ve-ry-thing, Sanem. Whatever I'll do 'wrong' in the future with any other female involved, please, I assure you that I will never ever want, feel, think or imagine anything with her, whoever she is. I couldn't be unfaithful to you, not emotionally, nor sexually. Only drugged and out of this world that could happen, even if I still would doubt it. So, whatever situations we possibly will live in the future, please...get mad, shout at me, punish me...but do not run away, Sanem. Do not run away and do not hide from me again. Please. These three days..."

He closed his eyes to avoid himself from starting to cry again

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He closed his eyes to avoid himself from starting to cry again. When he opened them he realized that he still got her hooked up on him and pinned against the window, so he withdrew himself and let her down. But only to be able to sweep her petite body up in his arms. She put hers around his neck and locked eyes with him.

"These three days, Sanem...have been the worst days in my life, do you hear me, babe? The worst ever. I was so worried for you, I missed you so much and I thought that I wouldn't survive. Maybe it sounds...pathetic to you, but...I can't breathe without you, so I've actually been with no air for three days and my brain must have got damaged; now you'll have to deal with 85 kilos of future husband with a damaged brain...more damaged than before. Worse than ever."

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