MY FAKE ROMANCE WITH THE HOTTEST GUY IN SCHOOL

CHAPTER 52: MIDNIGHT

Tom's point of view.  I wish I could sleep. I wish I could stop my thoughts. They are really haunting me tonight. I think I'm going insane. This girl drives me insane. I wish I could stop what's happening to me. But I can't. I feel helpless. I wonder how this is even possible. 

Tom flashes back to his daydreams. Picturing in his mind. I've got to stop those thoughts, because as bad as I want it, and hope it's possible, but it's also possible that she isn't going to fall for me or think of me as anything other than a friend. And she moves on and finds a man. That will kill me. I don't know if I can handle it honestly. Besides the fact that I love this girl, she's become my best friend. I can share, talk, she listens, I'll lose all of it, if she finds another man. Even if he would be secure and not tell her she can't be friends with me, I don't think I can be around her, if she is with someone else.

Tom thinks about the book. This book exactly is proving why I may never be able to get her to be mine.  I mean I've never understood girls, it's like sometimes they speak and live in a different world than me. They are moody, you can look at them and make them mad, most all are drama queens, well Madison isn't like that. Maybe that's why I fell so hard so fast. She's unlike any girl I've ever seen. But fact is, she's still a girl, and an emotional girl at that, that cries, real tears, not fake not pretending., I don't know how to deal with that. This story makes me see that. I mean we are seeing this story so different. And that's ok, if I didn't put myself as Efe to her Leyla. But since it's me and her in this story, it's not ok. Not at all. I don't see that Efe has done anything wrong. He's a cop, he has to leave, he was a gentleman to her, and I think Leyla is being almost a bitch to him. Yet, I get that I haven't really heard any of Leyla's story yet, she has. It just scares me that I'm going to be clueless and do or say something that hurts her, and she will not want to be with me. She thinks I'm just worried about the friendship, but actually that's not what I'm worried about. I'm worried about messing up my chance with her.  I need some air. Tom said, "Madison" I hear him, but before I can say anything I hear him talking to Baylie.

Tom said, "Baylie you want to go out and go to the bathroom.  Baylie got up and followed Tom.  He thought I was asleep. I wasn't able to sleep. My head spinning.  I text Emma ask her if she's up. She calls. She says, "how's your reading going" I laugh and say, "OMG explosive Emma."  She laughed.

I said, "not to mention I'm burning up, my body feels like it's on fire, I had to take off my clothes."  She said, "OMG Maddie are you and Tom" She laughed. I said, "Em, no, I meant I had to take off my hoodie he gave me."  She said, "I still think it's so sweet he gave you his fb hoodie" I said, "yes, I got so hot when he was reading to me, that I had to stop him and see if I could get one of his tee shirts to wear, and of course I have on his Nike shorts."  She laughed.  She said, "Good going girl keep stealing those clothes. Make him buy more."  We laugh.

She said, "I really can't imagine why he'd be making you so hot. I mean he's only one of the hottest guys in school, and he's reading a love story to you."  We laugh.  I said, "his deep voice is driving me insane Emma, but honestly, it's just kind of so intense, I had to tell him I was sleepy so we could stop, but of course I'm wide awake, my head spinning" She said, "Did you escape to the bathroom" I said, 'No Tom can't sleep either. He took Baylie out. He thinks I'm asleep. I let him think it. I don't know I just wanted to avoid talking to him for the rest of the night. I feel bad for it though. But I don't know what to say"  

She said, "Did something happen that" I said, "he got mad."  She said, "at you" I said, 'no at the story, he got upset."  She said, "OMG Madison he is for sure putting himself as Efe" I said, 'yeah, I'm almost certain he is. I mean because he's a cop I'm sure that's it."  She said, "Tell me what part he got mad at and how do you know he was mad."  I said, "Trust me he was mad. He has a temper. he was cussing, he was getting upset."  She said, "What is he mad at" I said, "Leyla, he thinks she is being unfair to Efe, he thinks Efe is a perfect gentleman to her, and he doesn't understand why she got mad when he left money. But Emma it's more this book, I'm shocked at how much it's triggering him" She said, "Tell me what you mean" I said, "Well I get he's a cop and the cop part and losing his dad, but it's more than that. Tonight, he got upset that Leyla got mad at him when Efe thought she danced, and I get why he feels it, because Efe doesn't know her, so he believed her. But Tom got all mad. Then started saying that he doesn't understand us women, and us women get mad at guys for no reason, and he never cared when it was that bitch, she was mad all the time, and he basically just gave her money to get her not mad, until the next time, but with me, he's worried he will lose our friendship because he will make me mad and not know what he did."