old cringe sapnap oneshots

💚💜I hate you... (With a passion.)🔥

CW//Cheating. Mid smut. I personally hate this but whatever.

A/N Heh, another one... I do not endorse cheating on your partner, rats, so don't do that or i'll beat your ass.

"Hey, babe?"

"Yeah, Funs?" Dream replied absently as he scrolled through his phone, leaning against the counter.

"I feel like... I feel like you're hiding something from me...," Fundy whispered, slowly shaking his head. "And you're always talking about Sapnap, or something, I honestly try to ignore it... Do you... Like him..?"

As he wrapped an arm around the fox hybrid, Dream let out a loud groan of disgust. "Hun, Sapnap's so fucking annoying... And immature... If I ever talk about him then it's probably a rant about the stupid shit that he does..."

"Really? You... You promise me that you're being honest? Because i'd rather hear the cold truth than be lied to, y'know..."

"Of course, i'll never lie to you... You're my partner, you mean the world to me," Dream grinned. "That dumbass could never replace you... We only hang out when we're around mutual friends."

Fundy gave a weak smile, shuffling over so that he could lean their shoulders together. "Alright... Love you."

"You too."

*--*

Swinging his legs as he sat on the countertop, Sapnap giggled. "Yeah right, Karl... That's stupid." The brunette rested his elbows on the bench and placed his head in his hands. "C'mon, Sap, you gotta admit that i'm right!"

"You're about as right as my left ass cheek, bitch."

"Whatever... Can we talk about something else now," Karl replied with a roll of his eyes. "Like... How you were totally chillin' with Dream that day, don't you literally tell me every day how much you despise him?"

"Yeah, Karl, that asshole NEVER stops TALKING about HIMSELF!," Sapnap laughed. "He's insufferable! I was just being polite, y'know? Didn't wanna ruin the afternoon for everyone else... How does he even have any friends, though?"

"Well, I mean, he's a pretty okay du-." Karl started.

"I bet that that loser gets literally ZERO bitches." He added, causing Karl to stand up straight with a snort of laughter. "True, zero bitches, no fair maidens..." The brunette wheezed, slamming his hand down on the table before checking his phone. "Oh, shit- I gotta go..."

He stepped over to Sapnap with a single fluid motion and leaned down, planting a quick kiss on his lips before swiftly turning and hurrying off. "I'll see ya' later, babe!" He called. "Byeeee, Karl-meister!" Sapnap waved, flopping backwards onto the table with a sigh.

*--*

"Are you SURE that you weren't seen or followed?"

"Of COURSE i'm sure! We're literally standing in a closet, your closet, who the hell would've followed me here!?" He hissed. "Also, Karl thinks that i'm asleep at home, or something, he won't be home for hours..."

"Awww... Greedy, aren't you? The second that your boyfriend walks out that door, you come running to me like a dog to its handler...," The blonde laughed with a smug expression. "Really, such a bad boy..." He purred, leaving Sapnap nuclear red. "Don't fucking call me that, asshole...," He snapped. "Plus, you're doing this too... You're dating Fundy, don't call ME greedy when YOU'RE doing the exact same."

"Although I am taking part in your fun little game, darling, i'm not the one who shows up at my door every time that Karl goes out for a few hours, begging like a bitch in heat," Dream retorted, rolling his eyes. "And by XD you're so WHINY, Sap, it's like you WANT me to shut you up."