Xingyun Oneshots

79 - Greater Than "I Love You"

It was incredibly easy to catch Chongyun off guard.

Scratch that, it was ridiculously easy to catch him off guard.

Coming around the corner to say hello? He's stunned for a good while.

Bringing up the mere mention of hot food? He doesn't know what to say.

Kissing him out of the blue?

...

Well that one's new, but there's a first time for everything, right?

Rarely did Chongyun manage to have alone time with Xingqiu in this day and age - either he was too busy to hang out in the first place, or there was someone in the public who could see them from afar - in summary, they were never alone together.

Tonight was a little different though, since Xingqiu managed to get out a little later without being noticed (Chongyun, for one, did not know he snuck out and would have scolded him for doing so) and invite him to a secret spot a little way off the trail to Wangshu Inn.

The two of them sat by the water's edge while the sun went down, watching all the fireflies come out to flicker and fly above the hazy horizon.

"This is pretty cool. I didn't know there were so many fireflies out here." Chongyun comments, wide eyed at the sight.

Xingqiu laughs his soft courteous laugh at his wonder and tucks his hair behind his ear so the blue of his earring glitters in the faint light.

"That's why I invited you here. It's a little spot that I'd come across on a late night back from Quince Village when I needed to rest for a bit."

"Wait, you went out to go deliver supplies on your own?" Chongyun asks. He tries to hide the dissatisfaction in his voice, but he can only hide so much of his emotion without some of it seeping through. "That could have been dangerous. Why didn't you ask me?"

"I had already asked you to assist me several times that week, and while I do love to bring you along for no reason other than to help me out with delivering such things-" he smiles slyly knowing damn well he made him read a few chapters from a book, "I figured you needed a break to go do other things. Our own alone time is important too."

"I guess so, but I still wouldn't have minded to help you out some more. Wouldn't want you to get ambushed or anything while I wasn't around." He blushes unwillingly. They both know Xingqiu was more than capable of defending himself, but it was easier than admitting he wanted to come with him.

"You're so thoughtful, Yu. What would I do without you?" He coos, the corners of his lips curving up even more.

"I don't know, actually." Chongyun thinks out loud, taking the question seriously. It's hard to say what your life would be like. But, I think personally if I didn't have you, I'd feel a lot more misunderstood." Chongyun determines, nodding at his assessment.

"You understand me really well I think, and it's be hard to imagine what life would be like if you didn't exist since you're such a big part of it."

Chongyun's eyes stay trained on the fireflies, the words coming out of his mouth without so much as a second thought when all of a sudden in their period of silence Xingqiu lips are pressed hard on his, making him gasp.

Chongyun doesn't move, he doesn't say anything, he doesn't even breath. He just sits there with with his lips slightly parted and stares directly at the blurry line of Xingqiu's nose in front of him while the world seems to stop turning.

Xingqiu moves his lips slightly against his, his eyes closed not in the delicate and perfect way when he laughs, but slightly squeezed shut like he's been waiting for years to do this and he doesn't want to stop. He lets out an elongated sigh of harsh contentment and longing, and it makes Chongyun go scarlet when it hits his ears.

It feels like time was standing still and like they would be here forever, frozen in this moment in time, with moving away not even a thought in Xingqiu's head.

Until it is, of course, because Chongyun isn't kissing back.

At some point during it, Xingqiu just freezes for a few seconds, his face so hot Chongyun can feel it against his before he moves back to where he was and looks at him completely now.

Chongyun can't quite place the look on Xingqiu's face because, well, he's caught off guard, but he really tries to figure it out before Xingqiu gets a chance to speak again.

His eyebrows are knit together almost like he's worried, his face is brighter than usual, his hands are tucked tightly at his sides, and-

Oh.

"You're embarrassed."

Chongyun doesn't even think about what he's saying until he blurts it out, at which point he quickly puts his hands on Xingqiu's shoulders and starts spewing apologies.

"Wait, that's not what I- let me start over! You look embarrassed, which makes sense since you just kissed me, - wait, that's not right, hold on - You're embarrassed but I don't know why, and I feel really bad because this feels like another one of those things that I should know but I don't and I'm really sorry but can you please tell me why you're embarrassed...?"

Xingqiu relaxes a bit after Chongyun speaks and un-tenses a little, exhaling deeply. "I'm embarrassed because I just kissed you and we're friends, but I thought now was an appropriate time before you didn't kiss me back, so I'm worried I just made things awkward."

"Ooooooh." Chongyun hums, his shoulders dropping a bit. "I'm totally fine with you kissing me, that was good! You're a good kisser! Amazing good!" His face flushes a hard red once he starts spewing words again and he waves his hands to try and start over. "I-I mean, I don't mind that you kissed me, you just caught me off guard and I've never been kissed before so I didn't know what I was supposed to do!"

"Maybe...kiss back?" Xingqiu raises an eyebrow with a nervous chuckle.

"I know that, but I don't know how to kiss! I've read about how awkward it can get if you do it wrong in those books you had me read to you, and I don't want that to happen." Chongyun says quietly while he looks down at his lap.

"Lucky for you, maybe I can help you out with that. Especially since, y'know, I'm a good kisser. Some might even say 'amazing good'." He laughs.

"You'll definitely have to then in the future." Chongyun sighs while Xingqiu's caught in his fit of giggles. "But I am curious about something you said."

"And what might that be?"

Chongyun's turns his attention back on the fireflies to try and divert his attention so he doesn't spew all sorts of embarrassing things again. "How come you thought that that moment was a good moment to kiss me? I don't mean that to sound bad, I'm just curious why you wanted to do it then."

"Oh. Well I guess that's simple enough." Xingqiu blushes and leans his head on Chongyun's shoulder.

Once again he's caught off guard, and if Xingqiu could have seen his face he would know he's burning up.

"Both of us realized that our world would be pretty bleak without each other. So I wanted to give you a powerful reminder than I'm not going anywhere."

Chongyun doesn't say anything in his state of shock, but Xingqiu knows he's listening intently when his head slowly falls on top of his.

"I liked it. We'll have to do it again sometime."

Xingqiu smiles and puts his hand over his, squeezing his hand. "Looking forward to it."

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Triple update today because I was really busy last month! Hope you enjoyed :)

Written: June 20th, 2023

Finished/Published: August 1st, 2023

(Word Count: 1,339)