1.
jisung, to renjun: do you want me to get you a step stool so you can look in my eyes when you threaten me?
2.
mark: [accidentally hits jeno while dancing]
jeno: you wanna fucking die?
mark: [whispering] kinda.
jeno: [soft voice] bro, we talked about this.
3.
mark: i'm gonna take you out.
haechan: great, it's a date!
mark: i meant that as a threat.
haechan: see you at six!
4.
jaemin: guys, guys, a raccoon is sitting on the couch eating a burger like it's a real person. look.
jeno: jaemin, that's just jisung dressed as a raccoon.
jaemin: but how is its tail moving?
jisung: [with his mouth full] witchcraft.
renjun: why are you guys looking at me?
renjun: fine, it's the most i could do when he asked to be turned into a raccoon.
jeno: jaemin, stop petting him, it's just jisung.
jaemin: that changes absolutely nothing.
5.
haechan: that giant box is mark's gift for me?
renjun: yes.
haechan: he is inside of it, isn't he?
renjun: yes.
6.
renjun: you can never say "bubbles" in a threatening way.
haechan:
[15 minutes later]
mark: renjun, why is haechan angrily screaming "bubbles" on the roofs?
7.
haechan: has anyone ever told you that you're beautiful?
renjun: no.
haechan: at least you're surrounded by honest people.
8.
jaemin: unpopular opinion, not all cats are good boys.
jeno: BLOCKED.
jaemin: because some of them are good girls.
jeno: unblocked.
9.
chenle: we can bake these cookies at 400 degrees for 10 minutes or 4,000 for 1 minute.
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NCT incorrect
Non-FictionNone of these are mine. Just a collection from Twitter and Tumblr.