Levi's POV:
I've managed to suppress a lot of my emotions. The best way is to stay inside and follow your daily routine. Same people, same food for every meal, same clothes for every day of the week, same bed, same amount of minutes in the shower. I believe that if I follow the same steps, nothing out of the ordinary will happen. Some call it OCD, I call it order. But that gets ruined every time Mikasa has her friends over. Especially Eren. I can fit a simple 'hello' from Armin into my schedule. But to have Eren harass me a week before my birthday was not what I planned on. I couldn't take it anymore. I don't know what came over me. I had the sudden urge to just fight. And now I'm here, uncontrollably sobbing in my mother's arms because old memories came back and my routine has been broken.
"Shhh, it's okay." I sat in her lap as she wrapped her arms around me tightly. "He didn't mean it, Levi." I still couldn't speak. I was so overwhelmed. What kind of 10 year old has anxiety? I felt like a freak. I was on the urge of hyperventilating until my mother moved me off her lap and laid down on my white bed. That was another change. That's why we remodeled the inside of the house. It reminded me of my father. I wouldn't be able to walk out of my room. But then eventually my bedroom started to remind me of him. One time my mom caught me sleeping in the shower with a towel as a blanket. That was the last straw for her. So we changed everything to black and white. Mom let Mikasa keep her room the same but every other was changed. A clean, blank slate. Nothing connected to any emotions or sentimental values. It was cleared out. She pulled my back to her chest and held onto my hands then pulled them close. This is something she had learned that would calm me down. I felt my heart beating a little slower, almost back at its correct pattern. "You're okay, sweetheart, you're okay." I felt my eyes getting tired, I could fall asleep.
"Mom?"
"Yes?"
"I wanna go to school with Mikasa next year."
"Really? Are you sure?"
"Yeah, I'm sure. I need to get over this."
"No." She gave me a light squeeze. "Eren didn't mean it like that. I'm sure he's really sorry. If you're not ready, don't push it."
But I shook my head. "I'm ready."
YOU ARE READING
Complications Throughout Generations
FanfictionThe rise and fall of Eren Jaeger was no mystery to the world. Neither was his love for the people he needed more than anything. But that was hundreds of years ago... Reincarnation was proven to be real. Will things really be different this time?
