Complications Throughout Generations

Chapter 166

Eren's POV:

I sat in my parked car in front of Levi's and waited for him to come out. Usually I'd just break into the house and take him outside myself but I'm sure he knew something was off. So when he walked out, he seemed tense. I'm sure he figured he did something. Once he got into the car, he didn't say a word and stared at my hands sitting on the steering wheel.

"My mom left." I said. I kept tapping the wheel with my thumbs, feeling more fidgety than usual but for clear, obvious reasons. "She was mad that I keep leaving to be with you. Only to find out it's because she doesn't like you and she doesn't like the fact that I'm with you."

"What, because of how I used to be towards you before I got my memory back?"

"Because," I took a deep breath, "she just doesn't...like that I'm...," I shook my head and lightly smacked my forehead onto the steering wheel, "bisexual." Levi didn't say anything but he started to rub my back underneath my shirt.

"She left because you're bi? That doesn't make any sense."

"Well, I fucked up. I told my dad to tell her the truth about us. As in, me and him. Back then. What we all were. What I was...what I did."

"She never knew?"

"He kept it from her all this time because he knew that if he did tell her, she'd leave." Knowing that this was entirely my fault made me emotional. "She's really gone, Levi." I whispered, holding back tears.

"I don't think she'll be gone more than a week, Eren. You know how she is."

I lifted my head up and saw the heartbreak in his eyes. I'm sure I was a sad sight. Tears streaming and all. Almost like a beaten dog.

"She said I'm a monster, Levi." I choked out. "A-and she said I'm not her son." That hit in a more personal spot for Levi. We all miss Kuchel. So I'm sure for him to hear how a mother could say such a thing is evil. He reached over and took me in his arms.

"You're not a monster, Eren." He shook his head and kissed my neck.

"How am I not?"

"Carla wasn't there. I was. I saw what you did up close and personal. If I thought you were a monster, I wouldn't even think twice about being with you."

"Yeah, but you're you."

"And what does that mean?"

"You're desensitized. Everything relating to that life, none of it phases you the way it does with everyone else. So of course you're not going to think I'm a monster."

"Did it phase me back then?"

"I don't know, did it?" I genuinely never knew. Every emotion I had ever read in his eyes had to do with us. Never anything going around outside of our relationship.

"No."

"How?"

"Because soldiers aren't supposed to get emotional."

"Clearly we're not soldiers now." I mumbled, slightly making a joke.

"Yeah, maybe not." He sighed and pulled away. "Who was once humanity's strongest soldier and humanity's last hope are now just...Eren and Levi." He tucked a strand of hair behind my ear and kept his hand on my cheek. "How did your dad take it?"

"Him and I are fine."

"Does he like me?" He seemed nervous but it actually made me smile.

"He does," I leaned into his hand and held his arm, "he really does."

"That's good at least." He seemed relieved.

"Said he read about us in the history books."

"Right," Levi rolled his eyes, "your fucking note."

"Maybe I'll see you in another lifetime," I smiled.

"God, I wanted to stab you in the throat when I read that."

"You never actually told me what happened when you found it. Actually, now that I think of it, you've always avoided it. Why?" He immediately looked sick. He nodded, internally encouraging himself to tell me.

"I think that was the only time you were a monster in my eyes." He whispered. It made my heart violently ache. "It beats everything you had ever done to me." He took a sad breath but continued. "I remember reading it and hearing the door open and I was praying that it was you but it was Hange. That set it into reality that you were actually gone. Everything came rushing to my mind of what I had just lost. I cried. A lot. You made me do that a little more than normal for my liking. Especially after that. I think the worst part of it was that I was going to tell you I loved you that night. So I just thought to myself that I was too late and too stupid. I thought that was it. Completely over."

I pulled away from him and slid my seat all the way back. "Come here." I held my arms out.

"Eren, I'm not going to fit."

"Yes you will. Just, please." He crawled over to me from the passenger seat. I found it funny how we've been sitting in my car all this time. But then he sat on my lap, facing me the way he always does. But I held him close, desperately.

"I'm so sorry, Levi." I whispered and squeezed him a little tighter. "I always loved you. I'm sorry I left you."

"It's okay." His body was at ease, I could tell by the amount of weight I was feeling on my chest. "If you didn't do it, we wouldn't be here right now." I nodded and continued to keep him close. "Everything's gonna be okay, okay?" I nodded again and sniffled. "I love you so much, Eren. You know that, right?" I nodded again.

"I love you."

He tried to get out of my grasp but I just whined, wanting him to stay.

"Babe, please." He kissed my forehead. "We'll go back to your house, I'm staying over, we'll watch a movie. We'll do anything you wanna do. Okay?"

"Okay." I nodded.

"But we can't get there if I'm still on your lap."

I rolled my eyes. "Fine." He just shook his head with a playful smile and got back into the passenger seat. I readjusted my seat and put my car in Drive but kept my foot on the brake. "Look at me." When he did, the smile on my face grew. He looked innocent but confused. Like a lost puppy. Innocence on Levi is so rare but it was beautiful. His gray eyes were a little bigger and his jaw wasn't as tight. He was just waiting for what I was going to say. "Yeah." I whispered, more so to myself, then looked back at the road before I was about to take off.

"What?" He whined.

"It's the same shit, you know what I'm thinking." I smiled.

"That doesn't mean I'm tired of it."

I finally started to drive and kept my right hand on his thigh.

"It's just that I think you're beautiful and I love you." I shrugged.

That wasn't everything but I actually did want to get home when he mentioned it. I'll tell him soon.