Complications Throughout Generations

Chapter 89

Levi's POV:

I'm slipping back into my old ways. This time even worse than before. I was starting to think I'd be okay with buying a gray shirt to have some color again but now I get anxiety when a mug isn't turned the right way in the cabinet. Everything is going wrong. Every bit of progress I've made is down the drain. Back to 2 therapy sessions a week, had to change my medications, I can't eat, can't sleep, can't leave my room. The second I come home from school, I run in there and read the books my mom got me. I've gotten more memories back. Now I understand why Hange is so obsessed with this. They're for different reasons but it's still the same thing.

"Wanna know something? I like you a lot, Levi. I like your eyes. I like how you act like you have zero emotion but your eyes say it all. I feel like I'm the only one that sees."

"And what are my eyes telling you now?"

"You're sad. I'm not really sure why. Should I ask?"

"No." I shook my head, looking away from his turquoise eyes. But I took it upon myself to return to his body. I rested my head on his chest as I wrapped my arms around his waist. He lifted my chin with his thumb and his pointer finger. He kissed my forehead and looked back at me. He broke out into a giant smile. "What?" I wasn't amused.

"Nothing." He shrugged.

"Tell me."

"I'm just thinking."

"About?"

He bit his lip, trying to contain his smile. "How beautiful I think you are." I let out a small gasp but then I shake my head.

He gasped over dramatically. "Is Captain Levi Ackerman blushing?"

"Shut up, brat." I roll my eyes.

"Come here." He whispered with a smirk and pulled me back. He passionately placed a kiss on my lips and I kissed back immediately. I wanted more as I run my fingers through his hair to pull him closer than he already was. He lifted his hands to both sides of my jaw and his thumbs on my cheeks. He caressed them softly. But then he pulled back to catch his breath. He traced my defined cheekbones and sharp jawline with his thumb. "So beautiful." He whispered.

"Eren?" A whisper was all I managed to let out.

"Yeah?"

"I like you a lot too, Eren."

That was the last one I had. He looked a little younger but I looked a lot older. His hair is longer now and he's about 2 inches taller. From the looks of it, I reach a whopping 5'3. I'll take it.

I also found out the letter I had received was in fact from Eren. Not only did he confirm it the night of Historia's party, but it was in the damn book. Page 118.

Captain Levi Ackerman was said to have romantic relations with the Founding Titan, Eren Jaeger. When Jaeger had decided to leave the Survey Corps behind in Marley, this was the written note he had left Ackerman, which was found in his room when had died:

Levi,

I hope you can forgive me for this one day. I wouldn't be surprised if you don't. I need you to forget everything that's happened between us. It'll hurt now but you'll move on soon enough. You're strong. The strongest person I know. I'm sorry for leaving you without saying goodbye. But if I had seen you, I was afraid I would've changed my mind. Take care of yourself, okay? Please. Look out for Mikasa and Armin too. They don't know. I don't expect them to understand either. Please continue to be that fearless leader that you are. The one that's inspired me to this very day. Goodbye my love, maybe I'll see you in another lifetime.

Eren

Of course he wanted me to look after Mikasa. Speaking of, I found out she wasn't even my real sister. We're distant cousins or some shit. Eren just put his together in the same womb. But why? Not sure. Somehow, there seemed to be no proof of any type of relationship between Eren and Mikasa. Just me and him. Actually, I had memories of me and Mikasa talking about Eren. I was a straight cripple. I mean wheelchair bound and I was missing an eye. It seemed like I was too cool to wear an eyepatch. Knowing me, I probably would've said it was Hange's thing. That, or I wanted to keep children away from me since I can't stand people. Maybe both.

"Annie said there's something off with you tonight."

"Didn't realize it was that obvious."

"There's different levels to your coldness. We've all known you long enough to know when you're in what mood. So what's wrong?"

"I don't know how to say this without sounding insane."

"Nothing will shock me."

"I saw him today."

"A hallucination?"

"That's what I want to believe. But I don't know how to explain how he's the one who did my hair for me today."

"What do you mean?"

"I felt him, Mikasa. He touched my face, he did my hair, he kissed my head. I felt all of it."

"Do you think you're going insane?"

"If I am, so be it. You were lucky enough to have a happy life with Jean and I ended up this way. Which is absolutely no surprise to me whatsoever. But if this is what it's come to, fine. You've known that I'd do anything to see him."

In that time, she ended up with Jean. But I feel like he was the next best thing. She would've gone for Eren if she could. I just can't get over the fact that she knows damn well what me and Eren had once. She knows now how I feel about him. Yet she has no remorse whatsoever. She dumps Jean, who was nothing below perfect. And Eren had me, a total dickhead, but he said he made this whole generation fit for us to be together, did he not? What the fuck happened to that?

I've already suffered a month of this, I don't know how much I can last until I snap on either one of them.

Fuck you, Eren.

Then I got another memory.

"What do you want, Levi? Here to kick the shit out of me some more?"

"If that's what you want then I'd be happy to."

"Try it and you won't like what happens next." I threw a punch as quickly as I could but he caught it in his hand. My eyes widened in disbelief. He held onto my fist and then pulled me to his chest. "Levi?" I nervously nodded. "I never want to see you again. Got that?"

"Got it."

He looked older. I can't believe that's Eren. I had never seen someone so perfect in my life. He was gorgeous. What was he in jail for though? I was 3 pages away from the massive Eren Jaeger section of the book. I've just about read everything there is to know about me, Eldia, the different Titans. All of it. I would've gotten to learn more about the Titans in middle school but Eren's dad went to the school and said how it wasn't a part of the school curriculum and that it was for personal research. Therefore, Mr. Jarnach was forced to cut the lesson out. I had him the next semester so I never got to learn about it like half of us did. Now that I'm reading this, I'm not surprised he did that. He did in fact kill Historia's family. I found this out from her, not even just the book. That's why her family isn't the biggest fan of Mr. Jaeger or Eren.

"Hange told me you're reading the book. It's...it's in there. But can you do me a favor? Just keep in mind that none of that is possible now and that's Eren from the 800's, not Eren from the 2020's here, okay?"

"Thanks for the disclaimer."

"Please, Levi. Promise me."

"Fine. I promise."

Time to find out what he meant.