Black Glitter *Completed*

If I'd Known...

*POTENTIAL TRIGGER WARNING*

The show was over but our day was far from it.

Adam had four radio shows spread throughout the day, the last one beginning at 10 PM that night, which meant I had a lot of sitting around to do. No one cared so much about me; as far as most knew I was Adam's brief plaything for the next month or so: no need to get excited until there was a ring.

Adam kept our fingers entwined everywhere we went, apologizing after every phone call he had, every interruption, every sudden change in plan. But there was no need to. Loving Adam came with accepting-if not also loving-his job. The day dragged on, full of half-hearted smiles, posed pictures, and a lot of zoning out.

In the car once more after the second Podcast, Adam took out his cell and went to Snapchat and then to the filters. I watched him from the corner of my eye and sighed when he lifted the camera to me. At the cute little smile on his face I couldn't help but smile as well.

"So beautiful..."Adam said smugly, typing.

"Oh, please. My face must show how much my feet hurt and I'm sure I've sweated off most of my makeup."

"Either way, you're literally perfect."

"Adam! Come on."

Adam pocketed his phone with a smirk and shook his hair from his face. "Babe, I am never not going to tell you that. If I have to say it a million times a day than I will."

Heat painted my cheeks and I rolled my eyes.

"Need proof?"

I shrieked when he pinned me against the car door and pressed his hungry lips to mine. I only pretended to fight him but kissed him back, happy for the thick, black glass divider between us and the driver and the heavily tinted windows.

Adam perched on his knees, one hand on the roof and the other on the seat by hips, caging me.

He moaned quietly into my mouth, tongue gently touching mine, knees bumping my hips. I gripped his belt and giggled, mimicking his motions.

But when I shut my eyes, everything spun. My heart began to race, my breath caught painfully in my chest and my mind suddenly went blank.

Not Adam's hands- not his mouth. Not his gentle touch or loving caressing. It wasn't Adam any longer.

Panic. I felt it ringing throughout my entire body: I couldn't run fast enough to escape this time. Something caught me around my legs and I fell forward onto the gross, slimy brick beneath. The stench of rotting trash bit my nostrils and filled my lungs as I gasped.

Heavy footsteps had reached me and his gruff voice made me whimper while I tried to scramble to my feet:I was so screwed.

He kicked me over but I tried to scuttle away.

Please, God. Not this. Not like this. Not here!!

My head smashed against the hard ground and lights popped in front of my eyes. My senses were on high alert but that wouldn't help me now.

"Please- don't!" I screamed, kicking and thrashing. "NO!"

"Ow! Damn, Nix! NIX! Calm down, it's me it's me!"

I opened my eyes to see that I had been pummeling every inch of Adam I could get. He looked terrified and worried and was gripping my wrists, trying to keep them away from his face.

"Adam! Oh my god I'm so sorry!"

Adam slid away from me, looking awkward. "It's fine. Are you okay? I hope I didn't...I mean..."

I shook my head and slowly moved back from him. His freckled and tattooed skin had little crescent shaped scratches over his arms and neck, several of which were bleeding.

"Oh, jeez...baby, I'm so sorry! Adam, are you okay?"

He gave me a questioning look before examining himself. "Oh. Hey, it's fine, Nix. Don't even feel it. Uh, are you alright?"

Before I could answer though, there was a knock on the divider and the driver's face appeared- he'd pulled over.

"Are y'all okay back there?"

I looked out the back window, leaving Adam to answer.

"Yeah, we're cool, Jake. Thanks."

Jake nodded and disappeared once more.

I cleared my throat. "Adam, I'm sorry. I...I'm not sure what happened to me. Um, flashback I guess."

Adam gave me a heartbreaking look that made tears fill my eyes. It wasn't pity, embarrassment- it was empathy. His heart hurt for me, which was a totally foreign concept to me.

"Sweetie, I'm so sorry. If I'd know-"

I shook my head. "No, don't worry about it. Forget it."

Adam dropped his voice. "Babe, has being close to me been harder since...the other night?"

I winced, unable to look him the eye, but nodded. He sighed and ran a hand through his hair.

"You're mad."

"What? Nixxy, I've told you this- nothing you've done or that you've been through would ever make me love you less. Believe that. Every word of it, got it? I don't care if you never want to sleep with me again, I only want what you want; which is for you to be happy and safe and comfortable."

I sniffed, at a lost for words. Adam cautiously reached a hand out for me and rested it on my arm, when I didn't shy away he moved a little closer.

"I love you. Forever. Tell me whatever you want and I'll always do what I can for you."

"Adam, you're doing too much for me." I whispered.

He tilted my chin up so that I was gazing deep into his dazzling eyes. "Phoenix Bay Barrow, don't ever say that. There's no such thing." And he kissed my forehead lovingly.

(Hey Glamberts! Sorry this chapter is a bit short, but I felt bad for not having posted when I said I would. Went camping for a few days and then had a day trip, and craziness follows! Oh and guess what? MY FRICKEN LAPTOP IS LITERALLY FALLING APART. Just writing this last bit the battery has fallen out TWICE. It gets so overheated it burns my hands, if the plug comes out for one second it totally dies, and now it's just like shutting off for no reason, and a few keys are starting to stick o_O

SMH.

So that's becoming a problem- really nervous about losing important stuff on here.

But oh well.

 Anyway, hope y'all are having a great week and are still enjoying the story. Thanks SO much as usual for taking the time to read and vote :)

 And as always I will see you in the next chapter! Buh-bye!!

~CG)