Black Glitter *Completed*

Call Me Back...

*TRIGGER WARNING*

ADAM'S POV

The disgusting pounding of terrible music was making my eardrums scream. I sat on the ratty couch, my skin hot and lips sore and raw. I stared down at my forearm, hidden under all those tattoos.

I hated myself. It burned within me just as bad as my skin did. The drunken laughter from behind and the smell of smoke was appalling.

"Adam! Come on!"

I looked over at Lauren, who was dancing, in a messy tank top with a beer in hand. They had invited a couple other people over, people from my past. It was as if they were determined to ruin any last shreds of self pride I had left by mocking me. It was like stepping back to the days around the Zodiac Club, after the show when I'd be stuck walking my way home alone most nights, maybe hooking up with someone, but usually by myself. Poor as fuck, with hardly enough money to pay rent let alone keep the lights on. This meant having to shower at the club on the nights I performed. When I didn't, I was stuck with just enough money to eat.

I got up and took to the shadows to the grungy kitchen where I shuffled through the drawers.

Bad idea.

I found the only knife that looked clean and leaned against the counter. Everything was zoned out; the shrieks, ghetto music, the feet tripping and bumping into walls because they couldn't see straight.

I took a deep breath: I'd never done this before, but I'd been to one of those weird ass orgy things where people would get high and cut themselves, or cut other people, and everyone seemed to like it. I avoided that.

I poised the knife over my left forearm, shut my eyes and inhaled deeply, then slashed it across my skin. A sharp gasp escaped my mouth and I flexed my muscle, making it bleed and ache faster. Everything washed away in a wave of relief and my head fell back and my legs dropped me to the floor.

The stress disappeared and the jolt of a high flowed into me as the blood streamed out. But as it began to fade away and the sounds around me were made apparent again, I started to panic.

I had to keep this all out.

The knife parted my skin again. Again. Again.

"Adam?! What the hell are you doing?!"

The blue eyes scanned my face. "You're freaking pale, man. You need to stop! STOP, ADAM!"

The knife was snatched from my shaky hand.

"Hey! Cut it out!" I yelled. Two more people joined us as my vision started to go hazy.

"Oh my god, I can see-his-the-"

"I know! What do we do? We can't call the ambulance or we'll get shut down-"

"Grab something to stop the bleeding and then we can take him to the hospital."

"No," I said, gritting my teeth and risking a glance down at my arm. My hand was covered in blood, as were my pants and the floor around me. "No, I'll be fine."

"Adam," Said Lauren, her London accent sounding like an angel's voice to my pounding ears. "Adam, you're going to pass out. You may not wake up,"

"Good." I hissed.

A strong hand on my shoulder brought my tired eyes up.

"And you say that I'm pale," I smirked. A cool hand on my skin, thumb brushing along my cheek.

"Adam, please."

Someone else out of my line of sight was wrapping a hand towel around my arm and I whined out loud.

"Adam, stay with me, c'mon baby. Hey, look at me."

"We HAVE to get him to the hospital, guys!"

"It feels so...good." I whispered.

"You're ridiculous. You need to get up now. Here,"

I was leaned against two other people, Isaac's face swam before me.

"What...Isaac?"

"Yeah. Adam, let's go."

"It's going to be alright, Adam. Minä lupaus."

"Speak English for once," I said weakly. "...Sauli..."

My knees buckled and my stomach heaved up all the booze from earlier.

"Adam! Baby, God, please...don't pass out...don't leave me."

I couldn't breathe, my lungs weren't working right, my throat was closing.

"I shouldn't have come here. I hate you, Sauli. I hate myself-"

"Sh. Enough."

They hauled me to the door and Sauli kicked it open.

"Nix...she's gonna kill me..."

"If you haven't already killed yourself."

~*~

Six rings before the answering machine.

"Hey, Ad. It's me. Listen, I'm at Kai's place. I'll be home by tomorrow afternoon at the latest. Baby, I'm so sorry, I never meant to hurt you and I didn't mean to start a fight. Hope you feel the same. Um, okay. Please call me back when you get this...if you don't hate me. I love you, Adam. So much. Bye."

( Sooo...yeah. Sorry it's short! I only wrote it in about two hours, and I could have done better but oh well haha. Remmi got in a huge fight with a big husky at the park and it shook all of us up a little- especially since I had to break it up :O It was scary! Everyone is okay, but yikes!

Anyway, thanks for over 5.5k+ reads!

As always, I will see you in the next chapter!

~CG)