Rain ~ h.s. (au)

Chapter 32

HARRY'S POV

''Harry how could you?'' Ashley screams. She pisses me off. It's ten in the fucking morning and I'm fighting with the biggest bitch in the world. Like seriously life hates me.

''How many times do I have to tell you? We're not together and we never will be together! So just stop okay? You're nothing more but a fucking friend to me.'' I snap at her and run my hand through this mess on my head. I'm beyond angry now. Pissed. She showed up at my house at fucking ten in the morning, and she started screaming about me being with other girls. What a way to ruin the day. Who does she think she is?

''But, I-I thought we a-''

''We're what? Together?'' I chuckle at this one.

''We-''

''Stop talking.'' I hiss.

''But Ha-''

''Oh god just go and find a life! Leave!''

''Harry-''

''I said leave!'' I scream, and she looks at me with eyes full of sadness ''Now.'' I say looking at ground, while my head is getting ready to explode.

She finally pics up her black purse from the floor and heads to the front door. When I hear the front door shut, I walk to my bedroom.

I'm hungry, but I'm too lazy to go down in the kitchen and make myself breakfast. I go to my bed and pull the covers over my head, letting warm and fuzzy feeling around my body. This is what I call life. Oh god. To much stress for today already.

I really didn't mean to be so rude to Ashley before. But she showed up at my house and started yelling at me for being with other girl. I told her from the start, I can't give her what she wants. She can't expect me to be her boyfriend. That's insane. She knows what I am like.

But I don't really care right now.

Honestly I barley had some sleep last night. I don't know how many times I've tried to sleep, but every time I close my eyes, I saw her.

Once again my mind goes back to Chris. I'm thinking about her a lot. I always had actually, but now I think about her in every second of the day. It's like everything reminds me of her. Every single thing. I'm here lying in my bed, and I'm thinking about her, lying here next to me. I'm eating lunch, or breakfast, it doesn't matter. I'm thinking about her sitting across the table laughing. I'm in the shower, and I picture her wet and hot skin pressed against min.

I find myself thinking about here on the work, while I'm watching TV or just doing some other things. She's always on my mind and I just can't stop thinking about her. Yesterday we were about to kiss. And that stupid, fucking phone of hers had to ring. It just had to. I was really pissed at myself for letting her go, but there was nothing I could do. If I did called her back, or just followed her, she'd get mad at me and tell me to fuck off.

I want her back, I really do. It has been four years. We both have changed I know that, maybe not on good,but I know she's broken, just as me. I know her heart is broken, just as mine is. And I know that no one can fix it except me. Not even her boyfriend whoever he is. And only she can fix mine. No matter how many girl I had before, or how many of them I will have, they'll mean nothing to me. Nothing.

+++

I called Robin one hour or something ago telling him I won't come to work today. Reason number one is; I don't want to go. Reason  number two; I have to practice. And reason number three; I have to keep Chris out of my mind because this is slowly starting to drive me insane.

I just had a fight with Louis about the same thing like few days ago, and I'm really pissed. He's my best friend for years and yet, he still doesn't understand me or my needs. He keeps on telling me what things I should do or not, what's wrong and what is not. It's getting on my nerves. He's acting like he's my father. And obviously, he's not.