Lost Song | male reader insert

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After I'd taken her home, we sat down and talked and I got to know more about her but I made sure to keep information about me unknown but she didn't seem to mind.

As the months passed, I did a lot of babysitting, even brought him to the office and people thought he was my son but after a quick explanation, I cleared up that he's more like a nephew if he was going to be anything to me.

I took the day off for Takano's birthday.

"Are you my daddy?" Takano asked as I sat on the floor with him. 

"No," I shook my head before pointing to Kaede, "dating your mother would be like dating a rhino."

"Well dating you would be dating an insult generator," Kaede retorted. I chuckled and picked Takano up.

"Where would you like to go today, Takano?" I asked him, he grinned and pointed to the door.

"Beach!" he exclaimed.

"The beach it is," I nodded before looking to Kaede, "go pack some stuff and meet us at the car."

"Yes, boss," she rolled her eyes before kissing Takano's forehead and going to pack things up. I walked out and put him into the car, making sure he was securely buckled in before closing the door and going to the drivers seat.

Kaede came out a few minutes later and took to the passenger seat.

I started driving to the beach. Takano was singing along to the random songs that were playing on the CD that seems to be permanently in my car. Not only my car but my apartment seems to have become his playground. Not that I mind, it's a lot more lively now and I feel a lot less lonely but soon enough I'll have Kaede and Takano out of my reach because I think I'm close to finding her ex-fiancé. I did promise her I'd help her get back with him but it doesn't make me feel any less sad about it.

The day was quite enjoyable. We spent time on the sand, building sand castles and having fun in the watcher. I was somehow convinced into buying ice cream and some random things.

We returned to their house at 8pm and Takano was put straight to bed, though he was already asleep, he must've been lulled to sleep during the car ride home. 

"Takano is in bed now," Kaede told me, I nodded and noticed her hands were filled with beer cans, "mind staying and letting me get drunk off my ass?"

"Sure," I nodded, "but I can't drink."

We sat on the threshold of the apartments balcony and she began drinking while I just listened to her. She was ranting about how she was struggling to find work because she didn't finish high school because she got pregnant with her first son. 

"You're very ranty when you get drunk," I chuckled.

"You know, I just realised, I don't know anything about you," Kaede suddenly said, using the can in her hand to point at me, "don't you have anything more than your snarky responses?"

"Like what?" I asked.

"Like your dreams? Aspirations? Goals and hopes?" she listed.

"I did have a dream," I replied, "but it's something I can't reach."

"Sounds like a depressing dream," she replied, "would you like to talk about it."

I frowned before sighing. She's brought me a lot of happiness recently and I know everything about her, indulging a little bit wont hurt.

"Fuck what the doctor says," I said grabbing a bear, "I'm going to need to not be sober for this."

So I chugged a can of beer. Wow, what an absurd taste. I grabbed another one despite the strange taste and chugged it before grabbing another and pausing, drinking it slowly.

"I love a man," I told her, feeling slightly woozy, "and I have for a long time but we can't be together. I wanted to have a family with him but for obvious reasons... we couldn't."

"What was your relationship with him?" Kaede asked.

"He was my classmate, then he was my boyfriend," I replied, "but then he broke up with me because of the difficulty it was to be together."

"And you still love him?" she asked, I nodded.

"I can't seem to find anyone who can make me just as happy as I was when I was with him," I confessed.

"So your dream was... to start a family with that man?" she asked.

"Yeah, but I obviously can't," I replied, "I've always wanted to have children of my own. Maybe I will meet someone who can actually make me happy or I'll adopt later on."

"Do you still talk with him?" she asked.

I finished off the beer I had in my hand and shook my head.

"We cut ties a while ago. Though, after he broke up with me I abandoned my connections and restarted," I told her, "I rarely contact anyone from my past. I don't really even talk to my family that often, I just missed so much time between everything that happened that I can't seem to catch up with it again and it's painful to be around so I just won't be around it."

"Sounds super depressing, dude," Kaede snorted.

"You don't even know the half of it," I laughed before we both just drank and drank, beer after beer. Talking through the evening.

At some point I blacked out. Too much alcohol, I guess and then...