A Dream Life With You

Chapter 102: Hearts Are Shattered Like Dust.

Oscar tried very hard to hold his emotions in but when he finished, a silent teardrop still slipped out of his eyes. Hearing all that Oscar said, Victoria's heart shook to its core and uncontrollably, tears fell off her eyes.

Victoria never regretted her decision. She never regretted anything in her life but one thing that stung her the most, that made her feel so guilty and sinful and for which she can't forgive herself is that she saved the strangers but ended up hurting her own so much. And today, hearing Oscar speak she finally realised how badly her actions affected Oscar. 

They left a deep scar in his heart that she would probably never be able to remove. She has hurt him so much from the start. She was prejudiced against him from the start just because he was a man. She knew very well that not all men are bad but she was kind of taking her anger towards those scums out on men because she had nowhere to vent her anger. 

Just because of that, she made him wait too long. And then when she was in a bad mood, she even told him off so cruelly when all he ever did was look at her from afar. And worse, after the hell she went through and finally regained a new life probably thanks to him, she said him to go away in the cruellest way and that was a memory she regretted more than anything else. 

What did he ever do wrong to suffer all of that? All he ever did was love her and protect her. He never did anything out of line no matter what but she, every single time hurt him again and again just because she had no one else to take her anger out on. She was such a sinful creature. God probably won't forgive her.

Oscar was engrossed in the memories that broke his heart apart. When he got his senses back and saw her tears, he finally realised what he said. Even though he felt like that, he never meant to say it out loud because it would hurt her but subconsciously he blurted it out and it was too late to take it back. Seeing that he hurt her, he felt so bad.

He quickly wiped her tears and said.

" I am sorry. Forget what I said. Don't cry. I am sorry." 

Victoria shook his head and couldn't speak as her emotions conquered her. She just hugged him tightly. He returned her hug and patted her gently hoping she would stop crying. If he said anything, she just cried more so he shut up and tried to soothe her gently. 

After a long time, she finally calmed down. She hugged him very dearly. 

" I am sorry Oscar. I know apologising won't fix anything but that's all I can do now. And don't say I did nothing wrong because I know very well how wrong I was. I saved a lot of strangers but hurts my own people. It's just that, at that time, I only had one thing in my mind and that was to save them. I always thought that if a day came that I was in that situation or someone I loved dearly was in that situation, at that most miserable moment, a tender moment where hearts are shattered like dust and no hope remained, if at that time someone saves me or my beloved someone, that would make me live again. I just wanted to be that hope. But still hurting you and my family hurts me too. The wounds from that time never hurt as much as hurting you all pain me."

" It's okay now. We will just make sure something like that never happens again. Leave it to me. I will do the dangerous work. That's what I am here for."

" How did you get those scars?" 

" I am the only heir to the corporation. Of course, I wouldn't be left unscathed. But some of the scars are from training and all.  What about you? How did you get that scar on your back."

" Oh, that one. I got it in the start when I actually started my work. At that time I didn't have any co-workers and investigated things all alone. I fought against one of those scum as he caught me. That's how it happened. I didn't go to the hospital as it would be a hassle. However, I needed stitches so I went to an illegal hospital. It was risky but those doctors didn't care about anything but money. So I was lucky. I still remember I had to change the bandages myself and once I ended up opening my stitches a little. It was all thanks to my stupidity. I had to avoid water but after some time, I felt so dirty that as soon as I felt slightly better, I went to bathe. After that, my fever worsened and I almost died. I didn't have anyone to rely on at that time. I didn't have you at that time."

When she said this all, Victoria felt Oscar's grip tightening around her.

" Why didn't you ask for help?! At least you could have asked Christopher to help. Wasn't he in town at that time?!" Just thinking about that sent shivers down his heart. What if he had lost her?! He would have never known that someone existed for him. That he also had that one person in life he could love more than anything.

" If I had told him, he would obviously know about my dangerous work and would probably do everything he can to stop me. And nothing could stop me from doing my work. I didn't want that trouble as I had a lot to deal with already. I was in a somewhat depressed state when I was apart from my family and all. I didn't care about myself. I only told you this all because I want to share everything with you. That is a painful memory for me but please don't feel bad about that. That was an inevitable fate same as the situation with Teddy. What's more, we didn't even know each other back then."

Oscar didn't show it much but his heart still bled. Victoria also knew that it would definitely hurt him but she wanted him to know everything about her. All that she has told others and all that no one else other than her knows. She expects the same from Oscar no matter how much these secrets might hurt.

" Shall we go to eat now? Our hard worked breakfast is probably all cold now." She smiled as she got up and held his hand to pull him up. She wanted to distract him lest he thinks too much into it.