Princess (Ziam)

Disguise

Another update! Yay! Lol

Chapter 8:

     I felt like a shell of someone I once was as I walked to school the next day. The only problem was that I had no remembrance of who I once was. I don't remember what it felt like to be truly happy because I've gone through hell most of my life. I learned to block out 'happy' because I had no hope of feeling it any time soon.

     My jacket was unzipped, inviting the cold air in. I always favored it. I had a strange desire to feel numb from the cold air nipping at me. Maybe it was because I wanted to be numb on the outside rather than the inside. I wanted to not feel. If I couldn't feel happy, I wanted to feel nothing at all.

     I thought about how I woke up this morning, finding the jacket on the corner of my bed. I assumed my mum left it there, probably seeing on TV that it would be cold today. It was nice of her, but I sort of felt guilty about her spending money on me when there were bigger matters.

      I finally reached the school building, and I walked through the front door, feeling instant warmth burst at me. I didn't know if I liked the feeling or not. It felt like something was bringing back the life within me, but I knew it truly couldn't. I don't think anything or anyone could once it's gone. No one except yourself.

       "Why the fuck isn't your jacket zipped up?" I heard Zayn ask, and it was only then that I noticed he was waiting for me by the school doors. He walked closer to me and zipped up my jacket. I couldn't even look him in the eyes. I was ashamed because of the things he knew. The secrets he managed to figure out.

      "Same reason why yours isn't." I mumbled, seeing his typical leather jacket that wasn't zipped.

     "Because I don't get cold easily. You're fucking freezing." He said, and I knew I was. I was fighting back the shivers that wanted to rush through my body. I knew my cheeks and nose were probably turned red from the cool air, but I shook my head at his observation.

    "I'm fine."  I whispered out, seeing Zayn stare at me intensely.

    "Are you?" He questioned, and I was going to defend myself, but he continued on. "If you get sick you'll have to miss school. You've never missed a day of school, Liam. Ever." He pointed out, and it made me question how he knew that. I was never even sure he noticed me before the bullying began.

      "Why do you care?" I defended.

      "Oh, I don't, but it's a lot more fun to have you to push around." He said, winking at me before motioning for me to follow him down the hall.

       Art class wasn't so bad. Call me crazy, but it felt like Zayn was sort of dialing it down for today. Of course, that only meant he was planning something bigger, and that's when I felt the panic hit me. What if he planned to tell everyone about my dad abusing me? What if he planned to show them my bruises and cuts?

     I didn't have much time to think about it as I walked into music class behind Zayn, freezing as soon as I saw Drew sitting in the same chair as last class. He looked over at me, smirking a devilish grin, and I hurried to follow Zayn to his seat. I sat beside him, strangely feeling safe next to him. It was quite bewildering because I was terrified of Zayn, but I trusted him to protect me from Drew. It was confusing.

      "Running to your little protector?" Drew asked, walking over to where we sat, and I saw Zayn look up at him with a warning look. "He won't always be around, Liam. After all, everyone leaves you, don't they?"

     He smirked and walked back over to his seat as the teacher walked into the room, guiding us through vocal warm-ups. I was a bit shy singing beside Zayn, solely because I knew he could bash my voice if he wanted, and that would defeat all of my confidence I built. Zayn, on the other hand, had a magnificent voice. His warm-up vocals were so smooth and deep. I was surprised when he could even hit high notes. His range was astounding, but I would never tell him that.