Princess (Ziam)

Passing

First off, thank you so much to everyone who has been sending me personal covers. I really love them all so much, and I appreciate the fact that you guys have taken the time to create something for a story I've made. It's so awesome! And I will be putting them up for vote soon along with the most voted of my covers, so be ready for that. :)

Also, this chapter contains some pretty heavy stuff. It goes a bit deeper into details of Zayn's past and his sexual abuse. I ask that you please, please read with caution and take care of yourselves. If you need to skip to another part of the chapter in order to maintain some ounce of security, please do. This is literally one of three heaviest chapters that will be in this whole story. Please read carefully, guys.

Chapter 73:

I woke up the next morning to find that our position changed throughout the night. Instead of holding Zayn, he was now holding me. I felt his fingers tracing my facial features before I even opened my eyes. Every soft, delicate touch left a tingle in its wake, and I gave out a sigh, knowing that I had to get up for school.

I opened my eyes to see Zayn smiling down at me gently. I found it something to marvel at every single time. The way his life seemed so down in the moment, but he always had time to show others that there was still love there. That beautiful smile the showed so much adoration.

"Good morning," He voiced, even if that wasn't necessarily how he felt. I could tell he still didn't get much sleep. The exhaustion seemed to be pulling on him, but he was pulling right back, fighting it to stay awake.

"I have to go to school," I decided to say instead. I knew that Zayn would probably need another day off. He looked far too tired to even make it through first period, and I knew Colette would put his health first.

"I know," He voiced, though he sounded hesitant to say it, and I saw the way his smile faltered for a moment. He didn't want to be alone. Not again.

"Why are you having trouble sleeping?" I wondered, changing the subject instead. I would make every second I did have with Zayn count this morning. I would talk to him, comfort him, until I had to leave him.

"Just nightmares. Um... flashbacks. Memories," He offered in a small voice, eyes breaking contact with my own.

"About your father?" I asked gently, knowing that it may be hard for Zayn to even hear about him.

He gave a slow nod, looking back into my eyes once again. I saw the metal bars in them. The prison of the past that he was trapped in. Trapped with no way out and no sure way to let anyone in. What was even worse was the fact that Zayn was the prisoner and his mind was the guard.

"After my mum died... I thought he would change. I thought he'd finally be just my father. But I was wrong," He admitted. Every new aspect of his past that he chose to reveal to me I kept close to my heart. I always marvelled at how strong he was. And my love and respect grew deeper with every confession.

"He actually got worse," He confessed. "He became more demanding. The abuse went from every now and then to nearly every single day, and I thought about ways to end it all. I thought about dying. Suicide. I thought about the multiple ways to do it. But I couldn't. I had to live because it's what my mum would want. And that's how I got the courage to tell my aunt, but I've never told her about how close I was to ending it all. I don't want to scare her that way," He admitted in a choked sounding voice.

"In the nightmares... he knows. He knew that I was going to tell my aunt. He comes into my room as I'm trying to focus on homework, and I immediately freeze up when I feel him leaning behind me, looking over my shoulder to see what I'm working on. I freeze because his body is too close, his lips too close to my neck. And... then he moves me work aside, saying I can do it later," He said, his distant and glazed, watery from the build-up of tears.